Come eavesdrop on another chat [Audio]

© Masocast by UnspeakableAxe

My third Masocast interview, ‘Ferns is back’, is live (the first interview from 2012 is here and the second from 2014 is here)!!

I had so much fun and a lot of laughs in this long chat with the lovely [unspeakable]Axe. We covered a wide and rambling set of topics related to BDSM from vanilla dating to how I should just go to New York to find a submissive :).

Random snippets:… Continue Reading

Loves: 7
Please wait...
Read More

Boys, toys, & champagne

© 'Champagne & toys' by and of Ferns

So a few things, random updates of sorts.

My Gentleman found my blog after our last date (hello there, MG :)). He could have found it earlier, he said, but he was waiting for me to tell him. Of course, we all know what happened before we got to that. He wasn’t upset about any of the content, and he was flattered to be written about, which is a relief to be honest. It means … Continue Reading

Loves: 17
Please wait...
Read More

Femdom vs vanilla dating: Different approaches and why

Public domain mark'Untitled' by Pxhere

Femdom dating vs vanilla dating is like chalk and cheese for me.

I mentioned in a previous post that on the vanilla dating site, I take a very different approach to ‘when to meet’ than I do on BDSM sites.

There are a number of reasons for that that range from the obvious and simple to something more complex.

The first and biggest thing that influences my decision on ‘when to meet’ is that I’m … Continue Reading

Loves: 19
Please wait...
Read More

Balance in F/m voices

It’s hard to write about the issues I have with the lines blurring between professional and lifestyle Dommes without sounding like I’m anti sex workers.

But I’m not. I think pro-Dommes are amazing.

I think skilled, ethical real-world pro dominants do an awesome and valuable job. The good ones invest considerable time, energy, and money into their craft, their spaces, their equipment and into making sure their clients get what they paid for, both physically … Continue Reading

Loves: 34
Please wait...
Read More

The value of the ‘fuck yeah!’

The contact with lovely man I had a cute chat with at the BDSM event didn’t go anywhere and a friend asked me ‘well why don’t you contact him again?’

Because there’s no ‘fuck yeah!’ there.

I was the one who made the approach to talk to him at the event, I was the one who asked for his contact details, we exchanged a couple of friendly emails after the fact. I sent the last … Continue Reading

Loves: 15
Please wait...
Read More

Post-a-day February: Done!

Phew!

You’ve had a whole barrage from me this last month. I’ve just been blurting stuff out all over the place :).

I don’t know how some really prolific posters do it, honestly.

I tend to only write if I have Something To Say. Plus I don’t really want to repeat stuff I’ve said before. PLUS I don’t have a lovely sub to actually talk about. And all of that makes posting so often a … Continue Reading

Loves: 9
Please wait...
Read More

Handy guide to interpreting BDSM personal ads

Here’s a handy guide to figuring out what people are saying in their kinky personal ads.

“looking for a true dom/sub”: I’m new here.

“I want complete control”: I haven’t thought about this one little bit.

“no limits”: I also haven’t thought about this one little bit.

“I’ll do anything”: As long as it’s hot like what I’ve seen in porn.

“discreet”: Having an affair.

“discrete”: Having an affair, but not very good with English.… Continue Reading

Loves: 16
Please wait...
Read More