About me

© By & of Ferns

All of me, everywhere

Why this blog?

When I went looking around for information/stories/porn around female dominant/male submissive relationships, I could find precious little out in the webosphere that actually reflected my experience, that made me go ‘me too!’, that described how I saw it, felt it, how I knew it could be. I found it frustrating that even the ‘real life’ writings seemed to be about one dimensional Dommey McDomme finding ways to ‘punish’ her lowly minions. Grrrr…

I wanted to read about real people living in happy, healthy, troubled, flawed, loving D/s relationships where the Domme’s submissive was her primary partner, where he was cherished, adored, and opened up like a ripe peach for the taking. I wanted incredible hotness and sex and affection and beauty. I wanted hurt hearts and struggles and magic moments and some truth that I could relate to. I couldn’t find it, so I created it.

I would be lying by omission if I didn’t also admit that I am a writing attention-whore. My blog gives me a space to pimp my writing out, to put it out there on the street corner, wearing a thong, suspenders and a top hat, and always, fabulous killer heels!

Getting feedback, having a dialogue with readers, the goodness that I get back from feeling this sense of community in my little corner of the blogosphere cannot be overstated. My readers often make me laugh, they move me, they teach me, it is wonderful. And sometimes, when I get a note from a young Domme saying ‘you made it easier to be me’, or from a new submissive expressing relief that he doesn’t have to be ‘that worthless worm guy’, I swear that I bounce around doing air punches and going ‘Yessssss!!!!’. It is happy-making to the nth degree.

Yeah yeah, blah blah, that doesn’t tell me anything about you!

Geez… fine… The obligatory ten things about me:

  • I wrote some books: Hot femdom erotica and a ‘How To’ Femdom Series and more – Sharyn Ferns: Femdom Author! Go take a look.
  • I’m a first generation Australian born of Dutch-Indonesian migrant parents, and never spoke any English until I went to school.
  • The above often makes people think I am a tiny Asian woman (Dutch, people, DUTCH!).
  • I’m 5’10, slim, blonde (yeah, I know… hubba hubba!).
  • I have a thing for beautiful shoes. To me, they are like wearable art. I like how they look, I like how they make me aware of my body, I like how they make my hips swing when I walk.
  • I post pretty prolifically on Fetlife where I say thoughtful and interesting things, and on Twitter where I say the not-thoughtful and not-interesting things.
  • I am impressively lazy, truly, it is one of my most endearing traits.
  • I have travelled some. Where to?  I’m glad you asked!  Here and here.
  • Champagne is my favourite drink (Ruinart, followed by Mumm, then Veuve Clicquot, just in case you are planning to buy me some).
  • I’m (still) single, and have posted a personal ad looking for my submissive man which is (shockingly) STILL valid. I’m open to sexy, attractive, intelligent, funny, emotionally healthy boys sidling up to me and being courageous enough to smile shyly in my direction.
  • I’m smart, but not as smart as I think I am.
  • I did a some interviews with the lovely UnspeakableAxe for Masocast, because it’s all about me, you know!:
    First Masocast interview
    Second Masocast interview
  • Third Masocast interview

  • I create a femdom Q&A podcast on a completely random schedule, so if you want to hear a Domme talking to herself in an Australian non-accent, get it here (links to iTunes & Spotify). I’ll answer your personal questions on the podcast if you Ask Me to.
  • I can’t count to ten.

Oh, and if you are a new and unsure submissive exploring the BDSM world for the first time, welcome!!  And please, please, read this advice… it’s short, and useful, and the wimmins will love you for knowing it.

Do you want to know why I think submissive men are beautiful? I created a celebration of the beauty of submissive men to show you, go and take a look.

One of my other favourite projects on this blog is a collection of happy femdom stories contributed by generous readers. I will always want more of these, so if you would like to tell your story, please read about the project here!

Not enough secrets about me? Well then, you will have to do a bit of work for more.  I have created an About Me label to categorise all the blog posts that tell you some of my secrets… that makes up for me not actually writing more useful stuff here, right?  Of course it does!


  1. Thank you for this wonderful blog. I really loved the approach. I’ve become a fan of ur words. Love it! dutch, asian, whatever you are doesnt matter. You are dominant and you have the right attitude. That matters :)

    1. Thank you for the lovely comment, caneslice. I’m glad you are enjoying it!

      Come, sit by the fire, grab a drink… I will tell more stories and secrets!


    2. I am a completely submissive relationship with a very successful Md who in her job has to be very ,not sure how to say it but she enjoys not being in control !

      1. we completely love each other and I enjoy pleasuring her never thinking about myself!She is beautiful and I cherish her

  2. Thank you for asking, Tom. I went and had a look at your site, and frankly, I don’t get it.

    Please email me about where you would be putting my content: I couldn’t find any place where it would be appropriate since a lot of the site seems to be commercial.

    Ferns (ferns AT domme-chronicles DOT com)

  3. Ms Ferns,

    i saw a comment Your posted on FetLife – “Online Dominence group, and was lead here after visiting Your profile there – i guess i was intrigued to learn more about You … *shy smile*.

    i thoroughly enjoyed my visit here. it is nice to seen a Lady who knows who She is and what She wants. i am impressed by Your insight and willingness to share.



    1. Hello willy,

      I am not sure which comment or group you are referring to (it is not ringing a bell), but it is lovely to see you here regardless, and thank you for shyly peeking above the parapet. Welcome!

      “i am impressed by Your insight and willingness to share.”

      *smile* And thank you for the lovely compliment.


  4. You’ve just given me the “Ah! That’s ME!” moment. I’ve just started my blog, as a way to explore and discern and understand these thoughts and feelings and okay yes obsessions I’m having about dominance. I’m RUNNING back to 2008… please do be patient with me as I catch up.


    1. *smile* I’m very glad for the ‘Ah! That’s ME!” moment!!

      I will be very patient, going back in time is exhausting!

      I look forward to seeing how your new blog develops, and welcome!


  5. Just discovered this site today and want to say that I find it an excellent resourse as opposed to all else written, the reflections,sharing and honesty,is truly a gift that I want to thank you for.

    1. Thank you so much for your lovely comment, PrincessDonna! I’m so happy that you are getting something out of it and that you stopped by to say so!


  6. Hello Ms.Fern,

    I stumbled upon your blog and I got sucked in.
    I enjoy it, I like your musings and a good lot of things (tho`I’ve not read all,yet) you’ve chronicled.
    I think I’ll make a point to come and visit your part of the bloggersphere. ( did I even say that correctly?

    That said, Cheers!

    1. Oh, I’m all for the sucking in, I’m glad you’ve been enjoying it, and please do come and visit lots. I will make cookies.


      PS You were close: Blogosphere

  7. In my imagination, you dwell in my cephalic vein, just below the halfway point of my bicep. I have a freckle that marks your presence there. It whispers your secrets to me. I write them down and store them in a tiny box hidden in my brain for safe keeping. Occasionally they sneak out at night to inspire my fingers. And oh! The words my fingers write because of them delight me! Like you. You delight me. Both imaginary and real. How do you do that?

    1. *smile* What a wonderful comment, I would like to be living in a vein, and marked by a freckle.

      And I don’t know how I delight you, but I’m delighted that I do!


  8. Your comments on Fetlife drew me here and I am now even more interested since I read your About Me section. I am a female submissive but I am fascinated with our differences and how our kink manifests itself. I would like to add your blog to my blog roll if this is OK with you.

    1. Welcome! And I understand what you mean, the differences are often the most fascinating part of other people’s stories, regardless of roles.

      I’d be happy if you added my blog to your blog roll, please do!


  9. I absolutely love this blog. It is so powerful and beautiful. It’s got me thinking about things that never crossed my mind before, and that’s always a good thing (not necessarily a nice thing, but a good thing)

    1. Thanks so very much for your lovely comment! I am all smiley faced over it.

      I’m also really pleased about the thinking thing, and yes, I agree… sometimes thinking can be a damn pain in the arse even when it’s really a good thing!


  10. Good evening to you Ms. Fern on this wonderful late autumn night.
    Don’t mind me intruding with a message this Thursday evening, but I have just come across your site, and from what I’ve read, it sounds so wonderful, a real breath of fresh air that I have been hoping to find..A Woman who speaks from the heart and still surveys the world to keep in tune with people in general.
    I intend to further read your blog when I’m off and I would be delighted to share a bit about myself as well. I’m at a point in life where ideally, want to connect with new individuals who can embrace aspects of this lifestyle by combining interests, knowledge, etc to result in something great in time.
    At 27 yrs old, I’m mature enough to understand essential aspects and the openness needed and most importantly to know and follow what’s in my heart. It is also an age where there’s no need to rush into anything in particular at the moment, and instead focus on the possibility of creating the proper basis/strong foundation for new friendships and experiences :)
    My apologies, I tend to ramble a bit at times >_<


    1. *smile* Hello William. Thank you for your lovely message, I am glad you are enjoying my blog.

      I liked your comment very much, no need to apologise for ‘rambling’. I do hope your explorations are going well. Have you had a look at Fetlife.com? You might find some of the discussions and groups there of interest.


  11. Shoes separate us from the lower mammals. :)

    But in addition to that I loved reading this introduction.

    I like finding a place where submissives are treasured for who they are. As I have read and researched what is means to be Dominant I kept having this vague feeling of disgust for the idea that I must be some awful man-hater. Which I am not. I adore submissive men for who they are…and for the way that they are.

    Thanks for taking your thoughts public.

    1. “Shoes separate us from the lower mammals.”

      *laugh* I love that statement.

      And yes, we are out there, the submissive-loving dominant women, and quite vocal, but there is *so much* of the stereotypical dross available that it can still be hard to find us.

      I’m glad you found me and can relate to my approach. There are more of us – take a look at my blog list.


  12. Finally caught up to present! Your writing is beautiful and is only surpassed by your wonderful sense of humour. Thank you for answering questions I didn’t realize I had, dispelling myths that I thought were the truth and for helping me see that no ONE way is the “right way” to Domme. I truly look forward to following you further down your path as I continue to explore my own.

    1. *smile* I love that you went through my old posts and left me some lovely comments back there. Thank you!!

      And I’m so delighted to hear about the things you got out of it, that makes me happy. Squeee!!


  13. Hi Ferns

    The more i read of your willing openness to expose yourself like this on the blog just blows my mind, i am aware of how many critics there are in the world and the attacks that occur over writing anything.

    Keep up the great work,You touch my heart and mind, something a lot of people can not do.

    I really enjoy your writing and pay you homage for it.


    1. Hello John,

      *smile* Thank you so much for your most lovely comment. I’m glad you are getting something out of my writing, and I really appreciate the sweetness.


  14. I am very glad to read your insight on the Lady Dominant / s subject. By reading your words and experiencing your vibes, I can tell you have risen above the mainstream of people who live this lifestyle. You are a wonderful lady with lots of heart. Soulful, passionate and intuitive. Tom

  15. Just found ur site. looks nice. nice to see a msg from this year. so that means u r still around.
    snd msg on fetlife..but no response..then notice how old they are..when msg was snt…plus also starting to think (do that at times) the femdom or women that are dominate n let other know n want a male slave are getting fewer by the day.
    one of things about on fetlife a. a poor slave stands no chance.
    b. women say she want a slave..but if slave has hair in ears..dont want slave.
    my thought (their it gose again thinking) that a women wanted slave to it could b trained. Only one perfect person every on earth. J.C.

  16. Hello J.C.

    Aw, bless. I’m glad you like what you have seen of my site so far, though methinks you have looked in the wrong place if you think my comment HERE is my latest activity.

    1. Look here, I’m still actively posting. This ‘About Me’ page is probably the most static one on this site.

    2. I have no idea who you sent a message to over on Fetlife, but it wasn’t me. I’m very active over there also.

    3. I also am not keen on hair in ears, so he’d have to get rid of that, all the better to hear me with. Doesn’t seem so onerous a requirement.


    1. Thank you so much for the note *smile*. I’m really glad you found your way over here and even more glad that you’re enjoying it. Thank you for taking the time to let me know.


  17. You have such beautiful and original thoughts! The real fact is YOU are beautiful! Thank you for your blog! Thank you very much! It is today that I came across it and I am sure I will be your follower forever.

  18. This slave thing bothers me. I would never want to be a slave. I am a husband who is respected by my wife. Why is this thing so polyamourous? Surely there must be faithful marriages which are ordinary but who share kink sometimes. I wish someone married would do a proper assessment of this thing. This contant dating thing leads nowhere in the end.

    1. There are plenty of married, monogamous couples who share kink sometimes: The possibilities of F/m relationship types and flavours are endless. You don’t have to be or do anything that doesn’t make you happy: Go forth and do whatever gives you and yours joy :).


  19. Listening to your podcast right now, after searching high and low for a lifestyle perspective, as a person who’s just now entering the world of domme herself and it’s so nice to listen to someone who’s got such an understanding of this world. Can’t wait to read your books.

  20. Hello Miss Ferns,

    Long time listener, first time caller finally plucking up the courage to make an approach and express my heartfel appreciation and admiration for all the content You put out, both here and through Your other platforms, I love reading and listening to Your words (and Your divine voice in particular which just makes quiver and weaken…)-as a lifelong submissive male who has often struggled with his sexual preferences and desires to submit and serve to a dominant female, it has been so reassuring and comforting to discover Your work, to learn that there are others out there who feel the same and open to the beautiful possibilities of D/s relationships, whether through kink or the wonderful chance of forming a genuine relationship based on the mutual love of dominance and submission. It is both inspiring and a relief to feel normalised in my sexual preferences and desires and in my search for a life partner who is equally interested and open to the idea of being the dominant to my submissive.

    I look forward to so much more work from You, maybe even the possibility of further opportunities to communicate with You or even support Miss in some small ways in her endeavours and goals.

    Yours humbly and in thanks.
    An admirer.

  21. Hello Lee,

    What a lovely comment, thank you for finding the courage to post it.

    I’m so pleased that you’re getting some reassurance and inspiration from my writings :).


    1. Thank You for replying Miss, it is wonderful to know You read and respond to comments here, just reinforces my sense that You are truly a domme who takes this lifestyle and scene seriously and value what Your followers and would be subs write and think.

      I would be honoured beyond belief if Miss ever wished to communicate further either here or through oher options.

      Yours humbly

      1. I always enjoy interacting with my readers :).

        If you have something you wanted to have a chat about, you can drop me an email (if you do, please call me Ferns).


  22. I followed your link from Fetlife. I am so glad I did as I got to learn so much more about who you are. One can only dream about having someone such as yourself as a Domme. A good Domme is difficult to find but it was great to read about you. I would take it your fully booked with slaves/subs and dont have room for any more. Myself…… I would love to be dominated and trained by a good Domme. To bend over and let her do to me as she sees fit. I like to believe I am very open minded. I would like to push my boundaries and limits. Where can I find someone like you to train me?????
    Keep up the good work. Your an inspiration to all :-)

    1. *laugh* ‘Fully booked’? You need to read a little more.

      I’m a lifestyle dominant, not a professional, so I don’t get ‘booked’. And if you just meant it as a turn of phrase, I’m also monogamous.

      If you’re looking for a dominant woman, I wrote this for you:

      How to find a dominant woman

      I hope it helps :).


  23. Miss Ferns,
    You have an excellent site. I’m still exploring all the stories and comments and I commented on one story already.
    Thank you.

  24. Hi,

    I wish I’d found your blog earlier. You write the way I want to read about femdom. So much of it seems to be focused on the physical, not the emotional. And it’s the emotional side that appeals to me. I love your writing and your approach. Femdom for me is just a different approach to a strong, loving relationship. It’s a thing of beauty.

    Thank you again for sharing so much of it.


    1. I’m so glad you are enjoying my content, and thank you for leaving me such a lovely comment to say so :).

      And yes to ‘a different approach to a strong, loving relationship’, absolutely yes :).


  25. A lovely introduction.

    Not as smart as I think I am!

    Hii ok nearly almost everyone fits into this category. But few are willing to admit it.

    Thank you fir your writings. I, like so many others here, will do my best to meet your demands for attention.

    I can only imagine in reality you are absolutely drowning in attention from so many submissive.

    It’s good to be queen.



    1. I missed your comment here, Thomas, belated hi :).

      And thank you for doing your best to meet my attention-demands :).


  26. Ferns (i hope i got the name protocol right)

    i just wanted to say a huge thank You for developing Your blog. It truly looks like a labor of love, and You have a wonderful talent for making all of it an enjoyable read, and more importantly for those of us just starting to understand our submissive lifestyle, it’s a beautiful resource. Thank You so much for sharing!!

    PS….nothing is more tantalizing on a Lady than a beautiful pair of shoes!!

    1. Hello glenn, and yes you did get my preferred name right, thank you :).

      I’m so glad you’re getting something out of my content, and you’re so welcome for it :).


  27. Hi Ferns – and other readers here
    I have just entered into this blog with more. I have a first question: I think I remember you writing something about how a sub should NOT/NEVER approach a M/s about starting a relationship ? Is that true, or am I mistaken – and remember wrongly. In the text was clearly outlined some very useful descriptions of exactly WHAT a M/s seeks to find in a relationship with a 24/7 submissive slave. I found the text highly informative – and now – it seems I can’t find it back….? Any ideas – or comments about this subject ? Thanks b4hand

    1. Hi again all & Ferns, just found what I was looking for – in some of the writings…txs anyway. Stay doing your good stuff here. It so useful (and needed)

  28. Hi Ferns,
    You know a lot of folks don’t talk about themselves like you do. It is extremely refreshing!
    It screams honesty. I know that is exactly why I like your website. Take care, and be strong.

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