‘Why BDSM?’ elevator pitch

In case you’re not familiar with the term ‘elevator pitch’, it’s “a short description of an idea, product or company that explains the concept in a way such that any listener can understand it in a short period of time.”
Wikipedia

The way it was presented to me in the corporate world was ‘imagine you’re in an elevator with someone you want to explain your product/concept to before the lift reaches their floor and the doors open’.

One sentence, maybe two. It’s only the start of a conversation but that start has to resonate.

If you can’t explain it … Continue Reading

Loves: 15
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How do you feel when you play?

A new dominant woman asked this of more experienced women in a discussion forum: “How do you feel?” She meant ‘when you play’, and it’s a great question that I’m not sure gets explored all that much from the dominant side.

She wrote:
So far, I don’t think I’m getting it… the thing that befuddles me the most, is how am I supposed to feel? Is there a way you should feel about this? Or does it make you feel a certain way? Is it pleasurable, like an orgasm, or like eating chocolate? Or is it something else? I read Continue Reading

Loves: 22
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Femdom blogger EOY message

© 'All Ferns all the time' by and of Ferns :)

As a proper-for-real femdom blogger, I’m supposed to do a proper-for-real end-of-year (EOY) roundup full of stats and reflection and forward-looking statements about goals and such things, especially since it’s the end of the decade. Phew!

I’m not going to do that, though.

What I want to say in my last post of 2019 is this:

I am lucky and privileged to have this platform to write, and to have you, my lovely readers, to accompany and support me as I go.
So I want to say a huge and heartfelt thank you for being here with me.

My auto-tweetery … Continue Reading

Loves: 43
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Come eavesdrop on another chat [Audio]

© Masocast by UnspeakableAxe

My third Masocast interview, ‘Ferns is back’, is live (the first interview from 2012 is here and the second from 2014 is here)!!

I had so much fun and a lot of laughs in this long chat with the lovely [unspeakable]Axe. We covered a wide and rambling set of topics related to BDSM from vanilla dating to how I should just go to New York to find a submissive :).

Random snippets:

I just wanna say ‘fuck you!’

Oh shit no. Oh can you imagine? Nooooo

I like to think it’s because I’m fabulous, but it’s really

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Loves: 7
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Boys, toys, & champagne

© 'Champagne & toys' by and of Ferns

So a few things, random updates of sorts.

My Gentleman found my blog after our last date (hello there, MG :)). He could have found it earlier, he said, but he was waiting for me to tell him. Of course, we all know what happened before we got to that. He wasn’t upset about any of the content, and he was flattered to be written about, which is a relief to be honest. It means I navigated the line just about right.

He sent me a ‘war and peace’ length email after reading about himself to share his thoughts on … Continue Reading

Loves: 17
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Femdom vs vanilla dating: Different approaches and why

Public domain mark'Untitled' by Pxhere

Femdom dating vs vanilla dating is like chalk and cheese for me.

I mentioned in a previous post that on the vanilla dating site, I take a very different approach to ‘when to meet’ than I do on BDSM sites.

There are a number of reasons for that that range from the obvious and simple to something more complex.

The first and biggest thing that influences my decision on ‘when to meet’ is that I’m an introvert and I get no pleasure or fun out of meeting people just because. So anyone who says ‘yeah, but it’s just a coffee … Continue Reading

Loves: 18
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Balance in F/m voices

It’s hard to write about the issues I have with the lines blurring between professional and lifestyle Dommes without sounding like I’m anti sex workers.

But I’m not. I think pro-Dommes are amazing.

I think skilled, ethical real-world pro dominants do an awesome and valuable job. The good ones invest considerable time, energy, and money into their craft, their spaces, their equipment and into making sure their clients get what they paid for, both physically and emotionally. I think it’s a difficult job, and they deserve every penny of the money they make.

I think skilled, ethical online pros and … Continue Reading

Loves: 33
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