Shit Ferns Says #13

I haven’t done one of these for EVAARRR.

Snippets of things I’ve said, no context, for when my brain isn’t firing up enough to write anything of substance.

Am I sitting on your dick right now? Then no, I don’t care.

If dominance doesn’t mean ‘getting the kind of sex I want’ I wouldn’t bother. I can do ‘getting the kind of sex men like and approve of within the very narrow confines of their expectations’ in the vanilla world.

I seriously have to point out how I linked ‘arsehole’ and ‘taint’ there…

If you just want to receive pleasure

[...Read More]
Loves: 14
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PSA: How I beat the Twitter shadowban

This is a ‘how to get rid of a Twitter shadowban’ public service announcement for anyone whose Twitter account has been shadowbanned long term.

I posted about my Twitter shadowban (what it is, how it works, and the wider issue for adult content creators on social media platforms), way back in October last year. My account was shadowbanned before that and had been shadowbanned ever since.

After trying everything anyone threw at me as worth trying, I finally gave up on that account as terminally shadowbanned and started over with a new Twitter account. Ugh.

Yesterday the Twitter shadowban on … [...Read More]

Loves: 8
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A little drunk

Home made rempeyek

I had Vietnamese pho today for lunch. And wine.

Enviously watching Vietnamese women elegantly eating the soup with chopsticks and a spoon while animatedly arguing about something.

I eat it western-style, like a pasta dish and with a fork. Still it splatters everywhere. And there was wine. Which always makes me want more wine.

Now I am settled on the couch with the vague hint of chilli and cinnamon on my breath.

Terminally tired. From what I don’t know.

I have things to do. THINGS.

I’m feeling a little melancholy if I allow it. Which I don’t, for the most … [...Read More]

Loves: 20
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General stuff and nonsense

I thought I’d post an update on what’s been going on with me. Mundane superficial updates totally count as quality blog posts, right? Of course they do!

Let’s see…

  • I’ve researched new web hosting for my website since my current host doesn’t offer any SSL in their smaller plans. Google is going to start penalising ‘not secure’ sites in searches and such so it’s a bit of a necessity. So I’ll be moving home soon. All going well, you won’t even notice that I’ve* stealthily moved my blog.

    *And by ‘I’, I mean MFMWKE (My Fabulous Man Who Knows Everything)

[...Read More]
Loves: 12
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Brittle

I feel brittle.

I don’t know why exactly. Well I guess I know why, I just don’t want to say so.

Not just brittle, but spiky. Edgy. Fragile. Irritated and impatient.

Breakable.

I’m busy being busy. Doing all the things, and doing nothing, making noise for myself, distracting myself from whatever is going on.

It works for the most part.

But I am caught in a quiet moment right now. Can’t concentrate enough to talk myself out of the quiet.

I will, though. In a moment. I can’t rest here, if I stop I am vaguely worried that I won’t … [...Read More]

Loves: 18
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Settling in

'Housewarming gift' by Ferns

The move went smoothly, my new place was clear of mess and liveable by the end of the first day (a promise I made to myself because clutter stresses me out and I did NOT want to wake up to stacks of boxes everywhere the following morning).

Though by ‘liveable’ I don’t mean that everything was all done and dusted. I’m not magic!

I mean that I had Carl (my coffee machine) ready to go for the morning (along with coffee, mug, milk, sugar: priority 1!), the kitchen was unpacked, the fridge had food in it, the living and dining … [...Read More]

Loves: 5
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Moving house %$#^&!

So I’ve mentioned my unstable living situation a few times now, so it’s no surprise that I’m moving.

Packing doesn’t seem like such a big thing. It’s a vague ‘I hate packing’ thing until you are in it.

It’s not the big things that are painful: Empty contents of wardrobe into a box, there, done.

It’s the millions of little things that make it such a daunting task.

That and the overwhelming urge to do a pre-move cleanout, which has me rifling through cupboards, running to the charity shop, posting things on ebay, and crying over photos of my dead … [...Read More]

Loves: 4
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