How do you feel when you play?

A new dominant woman asked this of more experienced women in a discussion forum: “How do you feel?” She meant ‘when you play’, and it’s a great question that I’m not sure gets explored all that much from the dominant side.

She wrote:
So far, I don’t think I’m getting it… the thing that befuddles me the most, is how am I supposed to feel? Is there a way you should feel about this? Or does it make you feel a certain way? Is it pleasurable, like an orgasm, or like eating chocolate? Or is it something else? I read Continue Reading

Loves: 21
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How to find a finsub: Part 2

© 'Findom spoils' by Ferns

Part 1 here.

So how did my Champagne Boy (CB) and I get from there to findom?

We talked a lot about various forms of D/s over the time we’ve known each other, his ideas and tastes becoming clearer, evolving. He became more comfortable with them, realised that F/m as a relationship model can actually work vs just being a fantasy.

Our discussions were largely theoretical and about long term relationships, but of course we were interested in each other’s views and wanted to get to know each other, so we talked about relationship styles and kinks and our respective … Continue Reading

Loves: 22
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How to find a finsub: Part 1

I have a finsub now. I guess that makes me a findom.

Typing that feels odd. And I suspect whatever you are imagining about how it works for me is probably not how it works.

Let me go back a step, talk about how this happened.

Firstly, I wasn’t looking for a financial submissive (finsub). I’m not a financial Domme (findom), have never been a findom, no matter how you define it (see here for an explanation of financial domination if you aren’t familiar with the term).

Financial control has never been a part of any relationship I’ve been in.… Continue Reading

Loves: 19
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Audio p*rn: Femdom podcast #106 [Audio]

© 'Ferns' Legs' by and of Ferns.

This short, sweet, gentle femdom audio p*rn is nothing like my normal podcast content. I ad-libbed the audio, and then wrote a story about it, a story that mirrors what I was thinking as I recorded it.

I suggest you listen to the audio first, before reading the story, and let your imagination take you where it will. See what kind of story your mind builds around the words you are hearing. If you want to share how it played out for you in the comments, I’d love to read your take. I’m curious.

Then I suggest you re-listen while … Continue Reading

Loves: 13
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Cougarling, with rope of course

© 'cougarling, August 2018' Rope, photo, effects by Ferns

Some light rope play in the morning. A pentagram chest harness. Easy enough, but not for her: Unskilled and clumsy, painstakingly following directions shown on a youtube video, backtracking, trying again.

He was patient, always. Happy enough to feel the rope on his skin, gentle kissing, her chin already scraped raw from the night before when he had arrived after a full day’s work, a flight, a drive, carrying his five o’clock shadow into his long weekend. The rope play had a friendly camaraderie rather than some hot intimacy that spoke of more.

They’d agreed a bike ride along the … Continue Reading

Loves: 30
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On using him

I get asked what my fantasies are relatively often. I think people expect to hear something relateable, something familiar, sexy, BDSM-ey, something doable.

But what I fantasise about, what I REALLY like and fantasise about, is to do what I want. To genuinely and honestly not give a shit what he wants. Whatever fucked up shit I want to do, let me do that. When someone talks about ‘using him’, mostly he doesn’t imagine it in the way I do.

And if we’re talking fantasies, I have a whole crew of men in mine whose bodies I can inhabit in … Continue Reading

Loves: 13
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Kissing date dreaminess

When the Pilot offered me a glass of the wine I had asked him to buy, I noticed two glasses on the table.
“None for you though,” I said.
He didn’t bat an eye, poured me a glass, put the bottle away.

I sipped the cold wine while I checked him out. I had him stand in the middle of his living room, I walked around him gently touching, seeing how he felt. He’s six foot tall. I’m taller in heels. I like that quite a bit. I took my time. I eventually had his clothes off, and I relaxed … Continue Reading

Loves: 12
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