Sent emails: Kissing date

Further to your ‘yes!’ to a kissing date, I’m going to give you some detail so you know what to expect.

It’s a date for the sole purpose of kissing. Just that. No food, no drinks, no chit chat, no hanging out, no going anywhere.

  • Kissing, stroking, petting (and some other naturally related things that flow from it… see below): yes.
  • Chit chat, fucking, orgasms: no.

I’d play it by ear, but I want to be a little careful with you. The following list of things are in the realms of possibility (it’s not a ‘will do’ list, it’s a … Continue Reading

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My sent emails XLVIII

To: dom-who-decided-to-be-an-online-sub

Hello there,

I was going to leave this unanswered because you are right, I’m not interested, but you seem genuinely perplexed at my response, so in the interests of ‘random acts of education’, I thought I would try and help.

I’m going to keep this short since you will either find it useful or think I am an interfering bint who should piss off, and I don’t want to waste either of our time.

1. It is disingenuous to call what you offer ‘online service’ when what you mean is ‘online play’

2. Service is ‘providing something that … Continue Reading

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My sent emails XLVII

22M, Illinois: Hello Mistress. Can you lock me up in a dog cage/confinement for a night or longer?

Me: Yes I can. Bring the cage here. To Australia. I await your arrival. Do not contact me again until you get here.

Him: How long can you keep me in a cage?

Me: YOU CONTACTED ME AGAIN, YOU RUINED [email protected]@@!!!

*block*Continue Reading

My sent emails XLVI – the sex-voiced Texan

This time, I sent sex-voiced Texan a photo of a pose I liked as inspiration: casual, leaning against a wall, hat in hand, boots on, jeans, no shirt.

He sent me three pictures: two variations of that pose, and one off-script photo featuring his bound hands, the boots and hat in shot.

I am (almost literally) floored by my visceral reaction to how beautiful he is. But it’s not JUST his beauty. It’s the fact that he happily trots off to do his best to give me what I want. Then he over-achieves. Unf.

This was my reply.

I … Continue Reading

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My sent emails XLV

I actually answered a personal ad by a local man that I happened across on Craigslist because it made me laugh.

I didn’t keep a copy, but it read something like this:

“This weekend I’m planning to rob a bank, steal a boat, then fake my own death.
I need a lady accomplice. Must be able to make sandwiches and have a sexy attitude.
We will escape to a private island where we will have our monkey butlers serve us pina coladas.
Are you in?”

___

Subject: Robbing a bank, stealing a boat, faking a death

I’m in. I assume … Continue Reading

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My sent emails XLIII

Polite enough email exchange with a 28yo who claims to be serious about wanting a long term D/s relationship. He lives in New York. No, Seattle. He’s 6′. No, 5’10. Whatever.

___

Hello Ron,

We’re done here.

Miss Pearl is a friend of mine and you are obviously an emotionally unhinged liar.

Don’t contact me again.

Ferns

___

Want an explanation? All righty then.

___

Edited to add: Here’s a follow up from Miss Pearl including the charming missive that was addressed to her but that our mutual friend cc’d me in on so that I wouldn’t feel left … Continue Reading

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