I need a man who can let me access the little boy inside. There is something terribly appealing, something precious about that wide-eyed inner child.
It has nothing to do with age play or infantilism, it has nothing to do with being maternal or a mommy figure.
It has to do with innocence and imagination and a sense of wonder. There is a quality in the men I like where they can open up and offer trust to a level that grown ups have forgotten, they do it in a way that makes you imagine that they have never really been hurt. That’s not true of course, about them not having been hurt, and in fact, the opposite would be true… the ability to allow someone to reach that little boy must mean that they get hurt more often and more deeply than others, and it takes a particular type of strength to behave as if they haven’t.
I liken it to faith, a little. It is a level of trust that makes them close their eyes and step into the void even when they are scared, even when they know they are vulnerable, they do it anyway. And it is more, even, than that. They are able to bring down all of their defences, they are able to be naked and scared and show it openly, without artifice or bravado… they are able and willing to strip back all of those walls that we build, the ones that separate us from others, the ones that make us seem strong and confident and invincible, they are able to remove those barriers and be small and raw and messy and vulnerable, and in that state, they trust.
If you want to know why I love the submissive men that I bring into my life, that’s a reason, right there, that little boy who will slip his hand into mine and follow me. I don’t know how they do it, it is an amazing quality, a strength that absolutely blows my mind, it is rare and precious and wonderful.
Honestly, I don’t know how they do it.