So, you (submissive male ‘you’) have emailed with someone for a while, she seems perfect, she ‘gets’ you, you have a lot in common, she likes your kinks, she thinks you are special. Then she asks for money. You go ‘hang on!’ and you baulk.
Then she sends something like this (actual email below). It is designed to hit every insecurity and doubt button you may have.
I am disappointed that you seem to want to fail so early and ruin everything but this is why I set this test. There are literally thousands of so called submissives who promise to do anything but really are just selfish and are only interested in themselves. This test is basically full proof in that respect as someone would never send a cash gift if they are a selfish person or disingenuous. Most just want to be submissive in their fantasy dreams and come out with unoriginal excuses trying to explain how wrong it would be to send a gift thinking they are being clever. Not realising of course that they have immediately stereotyped themselves, no woman wants a man who spends time thinking up ways to be selfish.
If what I have described in previous e mails is what you truly seek then you will not hesitate and understand why I have asked it. It is a significant show of trust and in terms of a long term relationship is nothing. Those looking for a quick masturbate would never send anything. If you refuse to obey then it is self explanatory no matter what you think, I have had far too much experience with fantasists and also real submissive men who are genuine so know the difference. If all you want to do is be submissive on your own terms and conditions then no Dominatrix will be interested in you.
I had thought we were getting a connection. The choice is send a gift through alertpay which is like paypal or goodbye. If you dont do as ordered then there is no need for any further emails as we will never meet. I will look elsewhere, so good luck in your life. Think carefully if you decline though as the opportunity will not be repeated by Me, dont miss it through being obstinate and its hardly like Im asking you to chop your arm off.
Do not judge me by standards of others either, you must move in strange circles!!
It is not as simple as ‘Hello, send me money’, the sting comes after there has been promising conversations, after there is some emotional investment and when there some hope.
Ethical lifestylers, pro-dommes, or findoms do not do this. It’s a scam.
Don’t give strangers on the internet any money.
Edited to add: Other common scams involve asking for hundreds of dollars to buy a BDSM ‘training kit’ or toys, paying for a first play date in a dungeon hotel (there is a professional-looking website with addresses and photos of these imaginary hotels all over the world: They do not exist), paying to have a contract drawn up, paying to show sincerity, signing up to some for-pay website, or bailing the ‘dominant’ out of some tricky situation she’s gotten into (stolen passport etc).