Love in the time of…

Public domain mark'Collage of book covers: Love in the time of cholera'

It’s hard to know what to do when you are overwhelmed by stress and fear and an uncertain future. I know many people are struggling emotionally, physically, financially. It’s an unprecedented situation and I’m flailing with the rest of you.

Here in Australia it feels like the end of times: Bushfires, floods, and now pestilence. Just, WTeverlovingF?!!

We are behind the curve on the spread of coronavirus/covid-19 in Australia, but our case trajectory is following a similar path to every other country. Theoretically it should be easier to manage: No shared borders, spread out population, good health care. But no. Apparently not.

I can’t say anything that is going to be helpful. Folks who are much smarter and more experienced have shared a million pieces of advice.

At the risk of adding to the annoying platitudes that are floating around out there, I’m going to say this:

Be kind, look after yourself and your loved ones, take joy where you find it, and give your mind and heart a rest if you can.

I see artists and writers and creatives saying that they feel as if now is not the time to be doing these ‘trivial’ things, that it feels wrong when the world is rightfully consumed with bigger things. But it’s not trivial.

Art and beauty is important in times of struggle. So is laughter and any and all kinds of pleasure. You are allowed to have those moments.

So if you are creating something beautiful, please keep doing it and sharing it. If you are enjoying something wonderful, hang onto those moments of happiness, and share them also. Listen to music you love, read books you enjoy, watch movies that make you laugh, spend time with those who make you happy (virtually if you have to), find positive and joyful moments and hang onto them. Easier said than done I know.

And while I’m here, a huge shout out and thank you to everyone doing essential jobs: Not just health care professionals (but absolutely all of them, literally risking their lives and those of their loved ones to help others!), but also the folks without whom everything would grind to a halt. People who do all the important jobs that keep everything running both on the ground and behind the scenes: the supermarket customer service folks, postal workers, delivery people, warehouse workers, truckers, factory workers, farmers, garbage collectors, tech folks, social service support, those working on our essential services. I hope people are showing you the appreciation you deserve. Thank you!

What I can do for you in this little corner of the world is write more, though I’m finding it challenging. Like you, my head is full and it feels a little like I’m treading water. I’m going to try, though. Just to, you know, put some pieces of femdom content here on the blog like everything is normal. Of course no dating adventures because who the hell is dating right now?!. Though on that, I did get back on Collarspace for a hot minute and I can write about that…

I’m trying to post only good things on my twitter: Silliness and cooking adventures and sweetness and beauty. Just… uplifting little snippets, small moments of distraction and happies. It’s not denial, it’s respite and escape. For me as much as for anyone who follows me.

I’m going to leave you with this because “Hazel… Hazel… excuse me Hazel” is just about the best :).

Oh and and… there are various kinds of wonderful live feeds all over the place that are so very good and life affirming (nature! puppies! penguins! eagle nests! water holes! sheep (that makes me laugh)! fish! etc). Here’s one source, but there are many many of them, and they are glorious. Go take a look.

If you have links to your art, your writing, your videos, or just ‘stuff you found that’s awesome’, please share in the comments.

Please take care of you and yours.

With love, Ferns

Loves: 19
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  1. “Love in the Time of Cholera” has been in the forefront of my mind as well. (My copy is like the one in the upper righthand corner.) I see nothing wrong with people making and sharing art, so long as it is the kind of art that can me made and shared safely. Art is one of the things that will give us comfort in all of this. Thank you for your encouraging words and fun times with Hazel the Wombat.

  2. “ it feels wrong when the world is rightfully consumed with bigger things. But it’s not trivial.”

    It does feel very trivial and petty. In my mind I know what you say is true but when I try to do anything normal or entertaining just a big wall of guilt hits me. I am struggling more today for some reason. Tomorrow is a new day though.

  3. I’ve been self isolating for years, mainly from stupid people, it saves me having my own chapter in Foresenic Handbooks. Stay safe Ferns and admirers

    1. Heh. I can relate.

      In practice not a lot is so different for me, though the gym and pilates created structure.

      Emotionally and mentally, though, it’s very different.

      I hope you and yours are staying safe also.


  4. heheh already follow Hazel. Love the wombats, they remind me of one of my partners :) I feel like now is the perfect time to hunker down and do the small things we can do. Not a thing we can do about most things right now except watch and wait and don’t make it worse.

  5. Want to share 1 good advice I heard over here in The Netherlands: Act Like you have the virus yourself and you don’t want to infect other people, so avoid the elderly and keep enough distance from the rest.

    Love Tiptease

    1. Yes, that makes sense.

      The number of people who think that the measures being taken are for THEM personally (and then going ‘I don’t care if I get it, sooo…’) is astounding and depressing.


  6. Salam.

    Been crazy here since main Shia holy season . We everything over phone/conference closed hussaynia to public. Only going to grocery every 4 days. Here they said people could walk hike etc outdoor activities away from people. As someone with an interest in anthropology and sociology it will interesting to see term cultrual affects.

    Me and mistress finding time to read together study and discuss talk to freinds on phone play broad games and if it gets bad we can do 10,000 steps of laps in apt

    If you live knowing death could come at any time but without illusions appreciate it more. Be minimalistic. Be holistic and healthy. Ezxerise and walk more . Ivfind being in nature very calming. Spend time with family. Average life is 9 billion seconds enjoy moment.

    The house of God is the heart of human. Just us being here and interacting with each is marvelous and wonderful

    Also we have wombats at our zoo the walk around open in a large section gated with 7 or 8 other buildings and a train they are so cool

    May we all make to the other side of the rainbow or in this case the plauge

    Live long and prosper ☮️ ????????????????✌️

    1. It sounds like you and your mistress are doing great: I’m glad to hear it :).

      I hope you and yours can continue to stay safe.


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