Birthday Nude: Touching

My dedication to the time-honoured tradition of the birthday nude is unparalleled. The camera on my phone is no longer working and I’m in the middle of move-planning, and yet here I am in all my naked glory.  Happy birthday to me! For my birthday, you can say lovely things to me so I feel fabulous about being another year older. […]

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End of year roundup: Top five plus nude

As a proper blogger (shut up, I am!), I’m supposed to do some kind of summary, maybe some stats, deep thoughts for the year, some goals for next year, that sort of thing. Maybe even *gasp* GRAPH PORN! But I’m spectacularly unmotivated to do any of that, so instead, here is a list of my most popular posts of 2016:  When your submissive says ‘no’ Advice for the newly minted submissive man seeking What happens if your submissive disobeys? Which strap-on harness? User names and you…  And since I’m much too lazy to do a proper roundup, […]

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Birthday nude: Strap-on

“This toy makes me want to fuck”. It does. Kneel here. Get it wet. Let’s get started.  My traditional birthday nude is neither traditional nor nude. I’m okay with it. Wish me a happy birthday, click ‘like’ so I know you’ve strap-onned (is SO a word, and no I don’t mean ‘strapped-on’) with me. Oh, and send me presents.  […]

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Birthday nude: Focus on breasts

It’s my birthday, and as is the annual tradition here on my blog, I am gifting you a nude photo of me. Ferns close up nude So happy birthday to me *smile*. Please send more champagne. I haven’t had nearly enough yet. And click the ‘likes’ button so I feel loved. Well, at least so my breasts feel loved…  […]

Birthday nude: Okay fine, fishnets & heels

Happy birthday to me!  My traditional birthday nude is turning more into ‘something I label as nude, but clearly isn’t’. But it’s my party and I’ll cliché-fake-nude if I want to! Ferns legs Wish me happy birthday, or at least click the little ‘Likes’ star so I feel loved. And send champagne. I obviously shouldn’t have to get my own on my birthday!  […]

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Beach nude

Since I didn’t quite manage the traditional birthday nude this year, I’m posting an ‘end-of-year’ nude. This is NOT the start of a new tradition that will go down the path of an eventual ‘blogful o’ nudes’! It’s more an ego-driven “Aw hell, these weren’t done in time to make the ‘birthday nude’ date, and I love some of these shots!” […]

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Birthday bikini

Dear world, It’s my birthday. In honour of this momentous occasion, and as tradition dictates, I am sharing yet another photo of me where the majority of the pixels are bare skin*. See me glorying in your cancerous sunlight yet again!  Please send presents. Sincerely, Ferns Ferns at the beach  Hit the ‘Likes’ star. Yes that one just down there. It’s my birthday, […]

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Birthday nudity

Far be it from me to break from the annual tradition of gratuitous birthday nudity. My gift to you. Ferns nude striped As always, presents, good wishes, over-the-top-flattery… all most welcome! I mean, it’s my BIRTHDAY! ** Edited to add: In response to some questions, yes, that’s a photo of me.  […]

Happy birthday to me!

And yet, even though it’s *my* birthday, I am giving *you* a gift… that’s two years in a row! My nudity is now officially an annual event!    And yes, it’s really me (I know at least one of you was going to ask!). The photo was taken on the rocky headland of one of the gorgeous beaches here. Happy birthday wishes, […]

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Birthday suit

I wore it especially for today…  It is International Femdom Day, and Ridley Scott is documenting the day just for me. People of the world are good to me… Presents? Of course you may send presents!! Silly question. Happy birthday to me.  […]