Happy Femdom Story: Longo Afar

Longo landed in my inbox with lovely compliments on my writing, and when he shared the fact that he was happily coupled up and exploring F/m with his wife, I asked if he would mind telling his story. He kindly agreed, and this sweetness is the result :).

Author: Longo Afar

Dear Ms. Ferns,

Having had the benefit of so much of your writing, I am of course pleased to oblige you with a small piece of my own. Though written from my perspective, the happy femdom story below as been reviewed and approved by my wife. Feel free to add it to your collection, which I have enjoyed reading over the last few months. It was an inspired idea for a project and we would both be delighted if we might contribute to it.

–Longo Afar

Our story is, I suspect, rather typical for most femdom relationships. It began one night when I had too much to drink and my wife talked me into putting on some of her lingerie “just for fun.” She then took pictures that she used to blackmail me into complete and utter slavery. Most of my life is now spent in a small cage in a dark corner of our basement, from which I am only released for whippings, canings, household chores and oral service. I am typing this story with my nose because She has decreed that my hands must forever remain bound behind my back.

OK, that’s not how our story really goes. But it is how it started, with typical femdom fantasies. Obsessive and marvellous fantasies that I could not get out of my head. Like many, I tried seeking professional help. Yet while pro-dommes provide a wonderful service, and I learned a lot from the occasional sessions I could afford, the main lesson was that this experience just wasn’t quite doing it for me. I therefore decided that my fantasies would remain simply that, and real life would proceed elsewhere.

When I married my wife, I did not tell her anything about this secret world. No, no, best not to scare her off and these dreams would never impact our real lives together anyway. But deep-rooted desires have a way of becoming insistent and nosing into places they shouldn’t. So at one point, I shared a fantasy or two. And what do you know, she was game. We tried a little cross-dressing, dabbled in bondage, and a small butt plug even appeared in our tool kit. It was fun, but somehow these sparks never really caught fire.

Such stabs at S&M bliss would recur at various odd intervals over several years, but then fade as the novelty waned and demands of career, child-rearing and other life events sapped our time and energies. In fact, as time passed I could feel the energy draining from our relationship. Pettiness, nagging and, most insidious of all, indifference were all becoming the hallmarks of our day-to-day lives. I was worried and started to wonder whether a little fantasy might be needed to rescue our reality.

The problem, I realized, was that my past efforts were focused on realizing my fantasies with her just playing along. Could there be a form of femdom that appealed to real women, like my wife? Happily in the years since our wedding the magic of the internet has grown in reach and power. Online research led me to writers (such as the ever wonderful Ferns) who showed that genuinely dominant women in fact existed and explained just what might interest such a woman in pursuing that type of a relationship with a willing partner.

Specifically, I learned to accept and value myself as a submissive and view my submission as a gift that women, OK maybe some women, all right hopefully one woman would be pleased to accept. And while submission was arousing to me, it had to be about more than just sex. It was a whole relationship framework that required carefully negotiation and patient development.

My next femdom pitch to my wife was therefore much more focused on her needs and desires, and went far beyond playtime in the bedroom. She is a strong woman, who likes to run things, and so the idea of her being in charge of the relationship proved very appealing to her. A lot of the niggling conflicts that had been dogging our interactions soon disappeared, as outright bickering or passive resistance was replaced with yes ma’am, let’s do it your way. And it was an enthusiastic “yes ma’am” on my part because we both knew that she was expressing her dominance over me and we both loved it.

We are about a year into the great reformation and are taking it slowly. Do we have the protocols? Yes we have the protocols. But nothing too elaborate or tiresome. I say my pledge of allegiance to her every morning and give her a special kiss every night at bedtime. And before bedtime? I don’t know why I used to want to keep introducing new toys since what she does with her fingernails and bare hands is simply mind-blowing for me. And she pushes my buttons of submissive pleasure, with increasing skill and confidence, not because she likes to hurt me, but because she loves to see me so blissed out under her control.

That is where I want to stay, focused on her, loving her, living in obedience to her. And yes, I would type this story with my nose if she asked me to. But it’s probably best to leave some things in fantasyland.

___

This post is part of an ongoing project to share positive happy femdom relationship stories. If you have a story that you are willing to share, I’d love to host it. Please check out my call out post for details and send it on to me.

For an entire book of Happy Femdom Stories, click here.

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2 Comments

  1. That is a good one (though I was a little worried reading that first paragraph!). It illustrates the importance of effective communication and how trying to turn her into a fetish-dispensing machine does not work.

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