Hauling myself out of a slump is tricky. If I try too hard, I rail against myself like I somehow want to see me fail. It’s ridiculous, and yet it’s true.
I mentioned that I signed up to this 10 week challenge at my gym which is meant to be all full-on, and it can be, but given I’m a bit broken I’m taking it relatively easy.
What it’s about for me is having an external goal to think about vs just rattling around inside my own head like some demented ferret. And the gym-driven program gives me some system of support (NOT because I’m going to talk to anyone else doing it… no no no! Just because it’s not ‘a thing that I made up for myself’). It’s about having a time-bound external project to point myself at so that I’m not just digging myself into a bigger and bigger hole of slumpiness.
This is week two.
I’m doing pretty well.
I talked to a personal trainer about how to work around my shoulder, I have a new routine that includes those considerations, that means I’m comfortable working out more and am not just doing lower body week in and week out. I’m trying to pay closer attention to what I eat (seriously, I had 100g of chicken with broccoli and spinach just now for lunch: I MEASURED OUT 100 GRAMS OF FUCKING CHICKEN! Go me *pats myself on the back*).
I feel a bit better with this external focus. Not anywhere close to skipping off at 100% ‘me’, but improvement is improvement, and I’ll take it. I’m calling it a tentative win.
Unrelated random thing: I have some high-end body lotion that I got for Christmas. It is ‘noni infused’, but it smells like passionfruit. I slather it on my feet before I go to the gym. I figure that sock-covered-lotion-feet getting all hot and sweaty will get fabulously soft.
This means that when I get home from the gym and take off my socks and shoes, I get the glorious aroma of passionfruit wafting all around me. I swear, I feel like some Goddess whose body naturally exudes this amazing scent out of my pores.
Oops, I mean “I am a Goddess whose body naturally exudes this amazing scent out of my pores…”