I rarely meet people off the internet unless they are potential partners.
I’m not a friendly person: I hate meeting people, and I hate socialising, so unless there’s a chance of at LEAST getting some kissing out of it, I’m not interested.
I made an exception for the lovely switch because, well, he was so very lovely. I also made an exception for climbing boy, because he was super sweet and local. With both of them, we had been e-friends for quite some time before I agreed to meet them. Simply put, I liked them, and our conversations prior had been interesting and sustained enough for me to make exceptions. In both cases, I was delighted that I did.
In March, I’m making another exception. I’ll be meeting Drew who writes over at The Drew Duality. He’s a Double Gold Star Gay switch married to his dominant husband and he has a bisexual submissive boyfriend who you might know from Denying Thumper.
I’m so excited! It’s going to be much fun! *bounce*
Obviously there’s no partner potential there, and I’d normally not be interested in meeting, especially since I don’t know him at all well, but he gets to the top of the line because:
a) he’s Thumper’s boyfriend, and, well I’ve blog-known Thumper for years, so he comes pre-vetted and that counts for something and
b) I just like him. In our brief exchanges, there’s a lovely familiarity between us, a mutual respect. I feel like he ‘gets’ me (no small thing). Plus he’s hella cute and our mutual teasing of Thumper is fun.
Though really, we’re just meeting to make Thumper jealous. And to talk about him… :P
He’s in another Australian city for work, he’s going to fly up to meet me. I’ll pick him up from the airport, we will head out for lunch and drinks and hopefully ridiculously entertaining conversation, and I will drop him back at the airport in the early evening. Or you know, maybe I’ll have to throw him in a taxi if we have a few too many drinks (this does seem likely).
On a related note, in the post where Drew wrote about meeting me, he also talked some about people’s perceptions of others online. This stuff absolutely fascinates me.
He’s getting quite a lot of hideous hate comments and mail about his relationship with Thumper. Some of Thumper’s fans DO NOT LIKE IT. I posited the idea that some people think they ‘own’ Thumper, they *know* him, they relate to him in a certain way as readers, and Drew’s relationship with him upsets their fantasies of ‘who Thumper is’. That is, they are comfortable with him being a straight man in chastity who’s in a loving relationship with his wife. When he veers from their ‘script’ of ‘who he is’ and talks about his boyfriend, they get upset and angry, I think they feel betrayed. And they figure it’s ALL DREW’S FAULT. It’s so very strange.
I’ve long been aware of the power of internet personas, it impacts me in various ways that I’ve talked about before. ‘Ferns’ is a strong and pervasive presence on social media: She is me, but she’s a tiny curated slice of me, more strobe-light impressions than a fully formed person. This is true no matter how much I share here or how honest I am, and I do share quite a lot and I AM honest.
I think ‘twitter-me’ is more revealing in a lot of ways than ‘blog-me’ since I obviously only blog when I have something to say. I tweet when I have NOTHING to say, so it includes a whole bunch of boring trivialities that is more representative of my every day life.
But either way, while I’ve had issues with my blog representing ‘me’, I’ve never veered far off-script, so I’ve not had the experience of dealing with people being upset and angry over it.
I keep trying to think of an equivalent that might happen in my life that would make some people upset and angry. And you know what I think might do it? If I was to get involved with a dominant man and decide I was submissive, especially if that man had a blog and was referring to me as ‘my slut’, ‘my girl’, my holes’ etc. I think that might provoke some really strong negative reactions (it provokes some really strong negative reactions in ME *laugh*).
Hmmm… April 1st… *smile*.