She ties him to the bed, face up – cuffs on wrists and ankles, spread-eagled, open for her, helpless, hard, exposed.
Then, a blindfold.
She hasn’t used one for a while, the darkness scares him, she can see it in the way he shies away from her hands, trying to sink into the bed, the way he licks his lips (she watches his tongue slip out of his mouth and lap nervously at the sides of his mouth, it makes her stomach lurch, her mouth opens slightly, almost involuntarily, she hears her own breathing, her eyes on his lips, she shakes the thought loose, kissing would be too familiar to him, too comforting, it is not what she wants).
She moves around the room, getting things ready, she takes her time, keeping an eye on him, she can feel the fear growing in him, she can taste it, it makes her smile.
Sounds of zippers, rummaging in bags, crackling plastic, soft footsteps, her swish as she passes the bed, the slight movement as she places things beside him.
His breath is coming quicker now, shallow, he is trying to be silent so that he can hear her, place her in the room. She knows that his heart is racing by now, that he wants to be touched so badly that his skin aches, that he desperately wants it to start, whatever *it* is, that he can’t bear this empty space between now and then.
He starts to squirm.
Aha…so it was you panting! Don't give me that Dommey-Domme stuff. He might not have been able to hear it because he was, uh, busy. But I heard it.
Can you plan it so that that raw emotion wells up in you, or does it surprise you? I suspect it's that raw emotion that he's more afraid of than the darkness; you there, unsupervised.
Blindfolds add such a different level of play. It takes one of the most used senses in which he can try to prepare for what is about to happen. Without sight, the anticipation and the imagination drives him crazy
Yardbird: “Aha…so it was you panting! Don't give me that Dommey-Domme stuff. He might not have been able to hear it because he was, uh, busy. But I heard it.”
Ha! You don't get the 'Dommey-Domme stuff' without a tribute, everyone knows that! I will neither confirm nor deny that there was panting coming from me…
“Can you plan it so that that raw emotion wells up in you, or does it surprise you?”
What a brilliant question!! You know that means I have never thought about it before, don't you?
I can't 'plan' it, nor does it surprise me. If I am in the mood to play, it is already close to the surface, and what I do in play is essentially manipulate him to feed it. So if I feel like his fear will feed it, I will make him scared. If I feel like his pain will feed it, I hurt him. Once I get to a certain point with it, it has a life of its own. I am thinking now of a bonfire… you have to nurture it at first, but once it has some fuel, it will continue to burn no matter what you do.
I can't bring it out if it's not already bubbling away just underneath (though there have been many many times that I *wished* fervently that I could) and I can't 'go through the motions' either.
“I suspect it's that raw emotion that he's more afraid of than the darkness; you there, unsupervised.”
If a boy can hold onto that niggling, uncertain fear, even when he trusts me, he is a keeper!
little bitch: “Blindfolds add such a different level of play. It takes one of the most used senses in which he can try to prepare for what is about to happen.”
That's so true. Anticipation changes from 'oh *that* is coming' to 'what the hell is coming?'. Fun!
I can only imagine how much he hopes you won’t forget about him. And also how much he hopes you will forget about him.