I’m pretty much back into a steady gym-going routine after struggling for a while. At the moment, that means three times to the gym and twice to Pilates each week. Motivation-wise I am doing okay, so I’m happy about that. I still want to get bigger and more defined, though I am pretty sure that that will require a level of Herculean effort that I am not willing to put in.
I’m still eating pretty clean, though the cold weather makes me crave hot, gluggy comfort food. I’ve cooked a few protein-rich dishes (chorizo and chickpea soup, chicken and two bean chilli, lentil and bacon soup), and put them in the freezer (domestic goddess that I am!) to try and address that.
Gym-wise, I’m not all that happy with the lack of structure in my workout routine.
What I mean by that is that rather than an ‘established’ program that is ‘proven’ to give results, I’ve taken to randomly choosing a workout to do each week from a selection of ‘all the workouts I have done so far’, and given there was a different one for each of the five weeks that I was seeing TFB (That Fucking Bastard, my personal trainer), there are 7 or 8 to choose from.
It feels unstructured (which it is) and a bit random (which it also is). I’m vaguely worried that I’m just flailing about and not actually making progress, and that makes me anxious. I’m working hard, sure, but I don’t really have any sense of confidence that I am doing the right things in the right order and in the right way to move forward.
Honestly, I never really have much of an idea what’s changing in my body, so I sometimes send update photos to my workout crew and rely on their positive feedback to keep me going (they are really good at that, thank you folks!). I’m muscle-sore on occasion, which I consider a good thing, and I am consciously increasing the weights/activity with each workout if I can and I’m seeing some improvements there, so I know there is *something* good going on. As always, though, I just can’t *see* it.
I’m adding this second bicep shot because the light in the top one is really flat, and the shadow in this one shows the shape of my muscle better (shut up, there is too some muscle there!!). Also it tickles me that I look like I’m gearing up to punch someone.