My sent emails XXI

Hello please_train_me_Mistress,

No, I won’t teach you. Don’t be passive and expect someone to spoon feed you. Use some initiative and learn at least something for yourself, then ask smart questions.

I suggest you go and read the message boards here [on CM]. Join Fetlife.com and read some discussions from people who live this. Even read my blog to get a realistic picture of what a D/s relationship might be like. Stop watching porn. Also … Continue Reading

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How old?

Given my recent ranty post about having ‘children’ listed as a hard limit, I am now going to ask a question that hits hard up against that rant.

What age does someone have to be before it ok to talk to them about *their interest* in BDSM? I use the emphasis there because I am making a distinction between young people being coerced and young people who HAVE this interest, they have these feelings and … Continue Reading

Loves: 2
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Fuck you, cancerous mole!

My twitter followers already know about this (thanks for the notes of support, folks!), but here’s the full story.

For a few months, a light coloured, flat mole on my back had been slightly bothering me. It would scab over and itch. The first couple of times, I thought I might have knocked it, but after a while, I realised that it was doing it all on its lonesome. Everyone knows that scabbing and itchy … Continue Reading

Loves: 6
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Survey 2011 Results part II

More graph porn!

(click the graphs for larger, nude version…)

Explanation of categories:

  1. “In the Bedroom” – as a spice to sex
  2. ~
  3. “Scenes” – may involve sex or not
  4. ~
  5. “Kinked-up Day to Day” – light play whenever, chores are part of the dynamic, big decisions are made on an equal basis
  6. ~
  7. “Not Quite Everything” – the dom is in charge of most things, but there are carve outs, like family relationships, job,
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WTF is with that hard limit?!

People who include ‘children’ as a hard limit make me shouty.

The only reason I can see for doing it is if they actually believe that playing with minors is such a common and acceptable practice with most of the BDSM community that they have to differentiate themselves from the norm by stating it.

The only thought process that makes sense to me, that justifies including it, is this:

“Playing with kidlets is the norm,

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Loves: 2
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Beautiful gift shoes

I realised in writing this that I have never had a pair of shoes gifted to me. Not ever. Does that seem strange?

So these are the first. They are from a dear man who I have never met, am hugely unlikely to meet, but with whom I have developed a lovely email friendship through this blog.

In truth, I was concerned about accepting his offer, worried that I would feel uncomfortable receiving such a … Continue Reading

Loves: 9
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Sunday curiosity: Survey 2011 Results part I

A huge thank you (again!) to everyone who participated in my recent survey. There were around 250 respondents (wow!). That’s a considerable increase over last year (see, if I had done a graph, that would have been a much more interesting factlet!).

My blog has changed quite a bit in the last year, as have my circumstances, so I was keen to see how that was reflected in the responses. Personally, I have become more … Continue Reading

Loves: 2
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