Reader Q&A: Energy in play and kissing dates

Advice and thoughts on nicknames, getting your needs met, building energy in play, and the intricacies of kissing dates.

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Hey there,
I’m an aspiring Domme. But I haven’t found a name I’m happy with yet. Any suggestions?
Thanks!
~Goddess _________

Hello there!

*smile* You are starting your name with ‘Goddess’ and you are asking someone who goes by ‘Ferns’. I think I can safely say “I got nothin'”.

My only advice is to pick … Continue Reading

Loves: 8
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Reader Q&A: Singledom & accents

I am blearily coming out of my December stupor of socialising, eating everything in sight, and drinking more than I ever need to. The normal routine of life will return shortly: shaking myself off, heading back to the gym next week. I’m expecting to have more energy to devote to things not involving making nice, and shoving things in my mouth, so perhaps more bloggery activity.

In the meantime, some lovely readers have landed in … Continue Reading

Loves: 8
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Reader Q&A: Expectations, clowning, & compliments

Questions from readers, no mucking about, let’s get to it!
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Met a Domme, dated briefly, she wanted to be friends, I proposed a D/s relationship, she said she’d consider it, we engaged in D/s flirtation, I offered specific service and got no reply, and a D/s relationship was never formalized. I felt teased & manipulated after awhile, asserted myself, she got mad when I wouldn’t serve her. I asked for clarification of our relationship Continue Reading

Loves: 8
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Reader Q&A: All over the place

I do love getting interesting questions, so thank you to those who sent them in via my Ask Me page. If I was organised, I’d do the Q&A on some kind of monthly schedule, but I’m totally not, so randomness it is!

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Hello Gorgeous,

People seem to think that because a woman is Dominant she must act in specific ways all the time. As intelligent people we both know that is not how it … Continue Reading

Loves: 2
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Reader Q&A: This and that

Random questions that arrived via my Ask Me page. I love getting them, so thank you for them anonymouses!

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Hello . I would like to ask you that what kind of activities should a Dom wife Exercise in start. Really looking forward to that

There is no ‘should’ here. Sit down together and talk about what sort of things you are both interested in, find some common ground that is safe and easy and … Continue Reading

Loves: 6
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On punishment

A reader question:

“In a recent thread on FetLife you mentioned that you use punishment as part of your dynamic, while both recognizing and agreeing with the reasons some do not.

How does punishment work in your relationships? Removal of privileges? Some kind of physical punishment? Something else entirely?”

I did mention that, yes. For the record, my comment is here (requires Fetlife login), and the pertinent paragraph was:

Those who don’t like punishment dynamics

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Loves: 25
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Reader Q&A: So what are you like?

So what are you like when you are not writing this wonderful blog ? Are you happy and chirpy ? Are you quiet and stern ? Do you have a coy smile ? Are you naughty ? Do you pull pranks on your friends ? *writes a hundred more such questions*

*laugh* Cute questions, but of course, the ‘what are you like’ one is unanswerable in any definitive way.

Are you happy and chirpy ?Continue Reading

Loves: 7
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