And… I’m back! Missed me dincha? It’s okay, you can admit it, I won’t tell!
I want to say a huge thank you to everyone who has been so sweet to me, both here in comments and in private emails. Your empathy and support has been really wonderful. Never underestimate the kindness of strangers.
I’m going okay here, I miss my boy* madly, but I am okay. We have exchanged a couple of sweet tentative emails, but we are both licking our wounds, and contact at the moment is a little raw. It is hard for me to leave him alone, I worry about him, I want to know that he is coping, I want to comfort him, and say sweet things to him and call him pet names and tell him everything will be okay, but I know that hearing from me will draw him back to me, will hurt him, so I am cold turkeying at the moment. It is difficult when I am used to doing what I want with him.
I have been filling my days with irrelevancies and indulgences:
- I changed my template here and played around with the stylesheet to customise it a bit (I haven’t a clue what I am doing, but I like that sort of thing). Thank you to those who have expressed an opinion on it to date.
- I bought new shoes, two pairs of fabulous heels (like that surprises anyone, right?).
- I worked, as always, half heartedly going through the motions like some mechanical wind up doll.
- I had a whole packet of tim tams for dinner one night.
- I bought a new hair straightener for too much money (yeah, that was kind of dull for me too).
- I read a book (Perfume by Patrick Süskind), which is strange and violent and must have been a complete nightmare to translate from German.
- I started reading a book about female serial killers <= see that, that’s evidence if I ever kill anyone now… You, dear readers, saw it coming…
- I went on a Segway tour – fun!
- I entertained my cousins who were here from the Netherlands and did my best to speak a little Dutch (I am rubbish at it).
- I had some great meals out with friends and drank far too much wine.
My irrelevencies do not extend to doing housework, so the place is a mess, which I hate, but I have no interest in doing anything about it. I am living in squalor, people!! Where’s a good service submissive when you need one, hmmm?
* I am still calling him ‘my boy’, I feel as if I should stop doing that, but I can’t, not just yet.