Nobody ever talks about ‘force’ as a kink.
We frequently hear about ‘forced’ activities, but the focus is always on the activity rather than the force.
Now, I know the term ‘force’ raises some hackles, so how about we say force = coercion? It doesn’t have to be physical, it can be mental or emotional or simply ‘force of will’.
So let me set a scene. I *make* my boy do something that he genuinely doesn’t like (not a hard limit)… No gun to his head – I may shove him about, use my serious ‘don’t fuck with me’ voice, ignore his reluctance, use ‘the look’, maybe slap him around a bit, snarl at him… that sort of thing.
Making him do something he dislikes makes him feel small, insecure, vulnerable (which I adore), and his reactions turn me on (hot hot hot!), which turns him on. So he is then embarrassed that something he doesn’t like turns him on, that he has no control over his arousal, and the loss of control there turns him on further.
So in the end, he still dislikes the thing, but he loves being ‘made to do it’ because of the control aspect and because he loves my reaction to it.
Do you recognise ‘force’ as a kink in and of itself? If so, why do you think it is that no-one ever talks about it?
* Recycled from a post I made on Fetlife