How can I help my partner be more dominant?

This is adapted from my response to a question on Fetlife that I see a lot from submissives who have partners who are new and exploring their dominance:

“How can I help my partner be more dominant?”

These questions always seem to be accompanied by descriptions of what they’ve tried that essentially boil down to ‘I told her how to do (more of) my fetish to me’ and, unsurprisingly, that doesn’t work so well…

This … Continue Reading

Loves: 26
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PSA: D/s doesn’t magic away normal human behaviour


In a book club chat with Joshua Tenpenny, the submissive half of the M/m couple who authored Real Service (if you haven’t browsed my non-fiction BDSM booklist yet, go take a look!), he talked about the realities of submission with years of real D/s relationship experience behind him, and I tell you what, discussions with people with that kind of experience is a breath of fresh air.

One of the things he said was essentially: … Continue Reading

Loves: 19
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Femdom audio erotica: Another drink?

© Image by the talented Stuart F Taylor (Chain Bear) (pixelation by me)

This is another femdom audio erotica story written and spoken by me: A taste of the femdom audio porn on my Patreon :).

I glance sideways at you, catch your eye. You are watching me. I know that look, it says “Here I am, Ma’am…” It invites and challenges me. It waits.

You are good at it, inviting me in, I mean.

I turn to face you and you hold your breath, steel yourself, shore

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Loves: 8
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Morning routine: Revisit

I wrote about my very dommely morning routine some years ago. My routine has changed since then, plus I’ve moved, so I no longer see the mountains out of my bedroom window: Boo. So I thought I’d do an update for those who are curious.

I’m a creature of habit, it makes me feel calm and settled to go through the familiar motions of things. This means I am entirely predictable which is a bonus … Continue Reading

Loves: 16
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How to negotiate BDSM play

One of the reasons I write my ‘How To’ Femdom Guides is because we talk a lot about the ‘what’ of BSDM-related things, but it’s very hard to find the ‘yeah but how do I do that’ level of detail in a way that we can use or adapt for ourselves.

There are many many reasons for this, including nuance and complexity and the fear of being ‘one true way’-ish, but what that means is … Continue Reading

Loves: 12
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Femdom audio erotica: Thinking (fantasies about you)

© Image by the talented Stuart F Taylor (Chain Bear) (pixelation by me)

This is another femdom audio erotica story written and spoken by me.

About masturbating
Thinking about you, and thinking about masturbating

There’s some teasing…

Maybe I would bring my cunt up close to your mouth
And maybe I would ask you how much you wanted it
And maybe I would stroke myself, close to your face
And linger on my clit, and it would make me moan

And some begging…

And if you begged,

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Loves: 10
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PSA: Live, free online BDSM classes!

I forgot to add in the ‘things I’ve been doing‘ list that I’ve been attending some live online BDSM classes.

If you’ve ever been nervous or scared to go to local educational events, boy do I have a bonanza of goodness for you!

Due to the lockdowns and restrictions, a lot of great BDSM educators and generous community folks have taken their previous ‘local-only’ skills and knowledge online to live webinars that they … Continue Reading

Loves: 11
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