Reader Q&A: Toy supplier recommendations

My wife and I are rather new to the mistress/submissive world. We have greatly enjoyed it, so far, and it has been very therapeutic as well (she was raped, and I was molested for years, so it is empowering for her in a good way, and I find it liberating to willingly give up control).

We are having some trouble finding good retailers of a few products, and were wondering if you could give some recommendations? Mostly looking for some sexy outfits for her, a good harness that has a pass through for a double since she likes the idea of both of us being penetrated (we already played back there on me before this), and a place to get some good crops, and other flogging devices.

I’m glad to hear that you and your Mistress are going so well and finding your relationship empowering.

I did a post about strap-on harnesses which you might find useful. I bought my last harness (Spareparts Joque) from Babeland and my last leather flogger from Sax (they are Australian, so check shipping if you are elsewhere).

I’m going to throw this out to my lovely pervey readers for more ideas.

Please comment if you have online shop or brand recommendations for any of the following:

  • Sexy outfits
  • Harnesses
  • Crops, floggers etc

Want to ask me something? Go ask your heart out on my Ask Me page.

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  1. I have a couple of UK recommendations for toy shopping nearer this part of the world: Floggermeister have some really great stuff and it’s well made. We got a Dragon’s Tongue from them and oh – it burns! :)

    Also I highly recommend Jack’s Floggers: Really beautiful, hand made floggers. My favourite toy of all came from here – a really lovely flogger, made with suede and wood and with just the right heft *drools a bit*


  2. If you’re in the US, I’d highly recommend my friend Rapture of Rapture Leather in the Detroit area. My first flogger was made by him, especially to fit my smaller-than-average hands. He made another for me recently in patent leather – again to fit me. He also makes collars and cuffs and other thing and is always happy to make them fit the person – just ask.

    As soon as I get off my ass and finish migrating my website to hostgator, the post with pics of my floggers will be back up – check back later this week.

    Ferns’ post on harnesses is spot-on and I don’t go in much for sexy outfits, so I’m not much help there. Corsets are lovely but rather spendy so I’d recommend an in-person fitting if possible.

    Good luck!

    ~ S

  3. At least in the U.S., Renaissance Faires are excellent places to find corsets and shopkeepers expert in fitting them.

    You’re more likely to find silk than leather, in my experience, but I’m sure it depends on the Faire. And you may or may not prefer leather.

    Some Faires have leather-craft shops with far more diverse wares, but quality varies greatly.

  4. You’d be surprised at what you can find on amazon. My girlfriend and I very much enjoy this riding crop:
    Riding crop

    Not particularly expensive, but actually great quality.

    Plus Prime Shipping! :)

  5. Thank you for the responses so far, and thank you Fern for replying to my question! I asked this question on fetlife as well, and got some nice responses over there as well:

    What I find interesting is that I haven’t seen, at least not that I have noticed, a single repeat recommendation. I guess that just goes to show that there are a lot of options that I was unaware of, although some thorough google searching with the correct terms is turning up more and more as well.

    I just wish I had some local options we could take a look at some of this stuff in person first. Doing online research on a couple hundred dollar purchase is a lot more worrisome than taking a look in person.

    1. You’re most welcome Peter.

      I absolutely understand how you feel about wanting to see, feel, touch, assess something in person before buying expensive toys. Maybe a weekend trip to the closest big city for a sex shop trawl?!

      One thing I find useful is to find independent reviews of products I’m interested in. Independent reviewers will (mostly) tell you the truth, though obviously with a personal bias. As an example, multiple reviewers (including me) said that the Stronic Zwei was *too big to use*, so unless you are a size queen, it’s probably not a good buy.

      When I’m convinced that I want (must have/need!) a particular toy, *then* I do a search for the supplier with the best price.

      Best of luck!


  6. I’ve been providing “extreme stimulation” to women for over 40 years, and I’ve never had the absolute joy that the floggers from UniqueKink have given me! Their interchangeable handles (patented), variety of leathers, lengths, weights, and colours are, well Unique! I first saw them at a convention in 2019. We probably spent over $500 at their booth!

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