Plans over Christmas are always full of family. This year is no different.
Even though we have only a very small family, everyone lives in different places so everyone travels. This person flying in that day, this other person driving here then, those people going there, then this person coming also on that other day and etc.
Even just looking at the schedule is exhausting.
I have post-Christmas plane tickets in my grubby little hands to go and see the sunshiney man with whom I had the weekend date: I will be with him for four days, three nights. I’m very much looking forward to unwinding and being waited on (this vs my normal feeling of ‘omg more peopling!’, it’s a very good sign).
We have talked around the potential a couple of times and have arrived at the stage where it’s a pretty hard ‘no’. But if we can get the chemistry firing, and can manage any emotional fallout, the goal is to see how much goodness we can get out of it.
I’m very aware that I’m the first dominant woman he has met, clicked with, and spent any time with. For any newbie who has had submission in the back of their minds and hearts for a long time, getting a glimpse of what they want is some powerful juju.
Quite a bit of that actually has nothing to do with me as an individual, but throw in how “smart, funny, sexy and…immensely interesting” I am and how well our styles of D/s align, and it’s a heady mix. We have talked about it and while I will obviously spoil him for all others, he is jumping bravely into a situation that has no happy ending.
One could say that it’s brave on my part also, but it’s not. He is a silly-heart, a dreamer, emotionally open, all of those lovely things, so however it goes, even if it goes well (or perhaps especially if it goes well), any aftermath will hit him harder. I’m hoping he doesn’t regret it, and will do my best on that, but there’s only so much I can manage from my side.
In the meantime, I send him ‘Good morning, sunshine’ texts, he sometimes calls me ‘Ma’am’ (he asked, I allowed it), and we chit chat during our days about random things. There are hints of organic D/s and we haven’t explicitly discussed how we will handle it when I am there, but I expect we will see how it feels to push at it a little.
On New Year’s Eve he will cook me dinner, there will be music, we will have champagne, maybe a walk to see fireworks, maybe he will teach me how to dance. I think it will be wonderful.
So yeah, I’m looking forward to it.