They had been in touch online and by phone already, he was funny, smart, he fitted. She liked his openness despite it not being his nature, his hints of shyness, his obvious desire to submit to her, his sense of humour, even his inexperience had appeal. In the last week before meeting, he seemed to be having doubts. She sensed his skittishness, like a racehorse baulking at the gate. She was travelling specifically to meet him and made compromises, unlike her, to reassure him and to ensure that the meeting happened. She felt disadvantaged, vulnerable, but she did it anyway, hoping she would not regret it.

She arrived before the meeting and checked into the hotel. When she got to the room, she prepared, just in case. She anchored the perfect lengths of rope to the corners of the bed, and within convenient reach placed heavy leather wrist cuffs, velcro ankle cuffs, clips, a blindfold and a ruler. She placed soap and moisturiser in the bathroom and put some towels on the tiled floor where she planned to have him kneel. The preparations excited her… thinking about how she was going to use him with each piece made her head spin.

She slipped into her g-string and bra, jeans, black belt, black fitted t-shirt and drew on her knee high stiletto ‘fuck me’ boots enjoying the extra inches it added to her considerable height, putting her at 6’2. She wasn’t nervous to be meeting him, but she was anxious about her own reaction, fearing she would want it too much, want him too much, or alternatively fearing she would feel nothing at all.

She waited in the bar, she was a little early. He walked in shortly afterwards, finding her quickly. She smiled and stood, greeting him with an outstretched hand, leaning in for a kiss on the cheek. He sat, far from her, and said he had had to run to make it on time. She smiled and looked at her watch… he was 2 minutes early. She examined his face as he caught his breath, leaning back, his legs outstretched. He looked better than his photo, and he was clean shaven for her as it was her preference. At 6’ and lean, he was just her type. His hair was dark brown, his eyes also dark, edged with a crinkling that hinted at a sense of mischief.

They talked about nothing much, chit chat, feeling each other out. He had a lovely mouth, full lips, great teeth… and she watched it as they talked, assessing how much she wanted it. The only hints at why they were there were vague references to things they had discussed online, and she made him show her how he checked what colour boxers he had on, a ritual she had imposed remotely. She watched as he pulled his shirt up, sucked in his abs, and pulled the waist of his jeans away from his body to look down.

“Show me,” she said, and he leaned over, pulling his charcoal boxers up a little so that she could see. She smiled and nodded, feeling a pull in her stomach.

After about an hour of talking, and quite a bit of laughter, she asked him, “What do you think?”

He nodded, “I think it’s going well, good rapport… what do you think?”

She nodded, agreeing. They were getting on well and she felt the hunger, soft and low, humming.

The conversation slowed as she started to consider if she wanted to play with him. By this time, the bar had started to fill, and he had had to move closer to her, he was within her reach now.

She leaned forward and beckoned him to come to her. He brought his face closer to hers and her hand snaked around his neck, caressing him, her fingers finding purchase in his hair, her fist closing. She saw him wince as she pulled his hair into her grip and tightened her hold. She moved his head from left to right, he looked down and closed his eyes, a soft “ow” leaving his mouth, the sound resonating in her. She smiled and pulled his face to hers, stroking his cheek with her cheek, breathing into his ear.

She released him and put her hand on his leg, her fingers sliding into the creases of his jeans behind his knee. He looked down at her hand on him.

“You have nice hands,” he commented, oddly.

She smiled, he was nervous.

She leaned forward in her seat, looking intently at him, silent, her mind working overtime, weighing up the pros and cons of playing with him, staring at his mouth, imagining taking it with her mouth, considering him without speaking. The heavy silence and the staring made him increasingly uncomfortable, and he squirmed under her gaze, not knowing where to look as the moments stretched. She seemed unconcerned about his obvious discomfort, in fact she enjoyed it, it fed her hunger. She played the scene out in her head and tried to assess how it made her feel, still looking intently at his face, her heartbeat quickening as she made a decision.

Finally, she beckoned him and he brought his face to hers. She held him there with a hand behind his neck. She rubbed her cheek against his, she hesitated.

Then put her mouth to his ear and whispered, “Do you want to come upstairs and take some clothes off for me?”

She felt him tense, but his response was immediate.

She heard “Yes Ma’am,” uttered quietly, deliberately, clearly into her ear.

She felt her pussy twitch… it was the first time he had called her “Ma’am” to her face.

“Are you sure?” she whispered.

“Yes Ma’am,” he repeated and her heart melted just a little.

She nodded, stood up and gestured for him to follow. She stalked ahead, and held her hand out behind her. She felt him slip his hand into hers, warm and compliant, and her stomach lurched with lust as she closed her fingers around his, leading him towards the foyer. She didn’t look back but pictured him obediently following as she headed for the lifts.

Loves: 6
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  1. Hi,Excellent Blog! It’s such a rush to know what a Domme is thinking during an initial meeting. I will definitely read the rest of your posts.And Thank You so much for commenting on my fetlife discussion. :)blueracer

  2. Thanks for the lovely feedback blueracer.And of course these are only *one* Domme’s thoughts during an initial meeting, but still they are true and I love that you got a rush out of it.Ferns

  3. The one comment that means something extra to me is“She felt her pussy twitch…”So often a scene seems to be about the sub and what they are getting out of it. To read that the Domme in this encounter is feeling turned on is quite a revelation. My Mistress often says to me that if she wasn’t getting anything out of it, we wouldn’t be doing it and i know that she gets turned on by my submission but even so, its reassuring to read the same elsewhere.

  4. nathanial: I’m so glad your Mistress tells you that. I think the perception of ‘cold bitch Domme’ that is pervasive in porn and stories and with online pretender wannabes means that submissives often don’t see the other side so much. In real life, a man’s submission is incredibly hot to the Domme, and if it’s not, then something is not working as it should.Ferns

      1. So this perturbs me a bit, Ferns. What I really love about your blog is your psychological perceptiveness and sense that you write from experience of the reality of the lifestyle, rather than some inflated fantasy, however hot. It is the realism that is the hottest thing, in my opinion. Then you write a story like this about actions that would be against your own, sensible, principles, as you just admitted. It just weakens the spell a little, for this reader, at least. You are of course free to write for your own pleasure and for whatever readership you like. Just saying what my reaction to this was. Perhaps you should add some markers , e.g. “a story ” to indicate when it is a flight of fancy and when it is the real you speaking.

  5. Hello Ferns ~

    New Domme here. I started playing about a month ago with my husband. I have been reading everything I can get my hands on since. You are the first writer that is not saying the same thing everyone else has already said. I appreciate the general definitions, rules and etiquette, as well as the supposed psychology of the D/s relationship. But I finally feel like I’m going to learn something new here! I am especially excited to read how you felt in your specific experiences and how you manage to figure out the wants, needs and deep desires of yourself and your sub missive. I would like to start writing my experiences as well. I believe it will help me understand my journey. What blogging service do you like to use?

    1. Hello back here! :)

      I’m so glad you’re getting something out of my writing.

      I’m self hosted, but you can set up a free blog in about 10 minutes on If you stick at it and want to self-host later, it’s easy to move existing content from there.

      I look forward to reading about your adventures :).


  6. Ah…I forgot how much I enjoy this piece. You evoke such a rich and intense ‘feel’ for the very first few moments of a female-led dynamic. This piece continues to sizzle every time I re-read it. I discovered it at work the first time through and flushed deep red when interrupted by a co-worker.

    Lesson learned, and I never grazed your site at work again.

    1. Thank you so much: he was such a sweetheart. My very first post here on the blog was about him, post-breakup.

      And yes, I’d wager that the most enjoyable of my writing is definitely NSFW *smile*.


  7. So, the goal was to start at the beginning of your blog and read forward.

    Having to take a break after just this.

    This reading my take a while.

    I love the description of sizing him up and feeling his discomfort, that sensation of being predator and prey was very hot.

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