What any of my writing really is…

This is what any of my writing actually is…

…blah blah blah current musings, relevant anecdote, nebulous/inconclusive observations about myself, occasional joke, relatable commentary on human needs…

…but what i am really always asking is, why doesn’t anyone have both of their hands on my butt right now?

— wordsandturds.com

This quote made me laugh, so I’m sharing. And anyway, why *doesn’t* anyone have both of their hands on my butt right now?!

Loves: 3
Please wait…

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        1. *laugh* That is your new safeword, spelled out in full, with the correct number of ‘a’s and ‘r’s.


    1. *laugh* Who knew that a tummy was just a cock-proxy… live and learn, eh?

      “I smell an Oscar… or something.”

      Oh yeah!

      *sticks right leg out awkwardly, does a weirdly random throaty laugh*


  1. But the T-shirt…. What about the T-shirt??? That’s awesome too. It may sound strange compared to other stuff but please please please what about the T-shirt? Won’t somebody please think about the T-shirt???

    Oh yeah – I still am.

    A lot. My job is now thinking about the T-shirt. Still not giving a fuck about whatever all those word things say. Like T-shirt much. Strange urge to beg.

  2. ~Laughing~… How totally awesomely fucking hot was that? Words failed him as he had to spell out “AARRRGGH”… I mean… That was just the BEST ever. Great stuff. See you at Cannes!

    1. *laugh* I would, but you essentially only get to make one for free. After that you have to pay…

      Obviously I need funding from a big movie studio… I am expecting a call from them any minute…


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