I hurt you with the belt, and I use familiar words and a familiar tone and it is nothing new but I am tentative and feeling my way and pushing myself to do it, and it is short and should be minor and inconsequential but we both know it’s not. Afterwards, we are both breathing emotion and feeling each other for the fallout.
I am raw and splayed open and it feels like my heart is broken and you watch me softly and that makes me burst like ripeness spilling over from my throat and I am crying.
You gentle me like I am some wild creature that you want to calm and bring to you, whispering ‘It’s ok…. it’s ok… it’s ok sweetheart…’ into my ear and it is unbearably sweet. I know, I am ok, I will be ok, we will be ok.