I had a dream last night: I was in a room that was full of cages with men locked inside them.
The cages were about waist high, had thick bars. The men inside were crouched down or on all fours.
I walked among them, between the cages. The men were not fully visible in the dream, but dream-me tried hard to make them fit my ideal, which was strange wilfulness on the part of my … Continue Reading
I am being inspired by pieces I am reading out on the internet:
This, about crushes.
This, about lost loves.
This, about sweetness.
I want to write about my fleeting hopeful crushes, about things past, about incredible sweetness.
I have been busy and overwhelmed recently by Christmas, by people, by my book, by practicalities, and it saps my energy for writing. But I feel it bubbling now, which I love, … Continue Reading
You know I missed number 4. That ‘shit I said’ list was apparently so lame, I didn’t even post it. Nobody cared. Nobody noticed. What I need is some decent stalkers who pay attention! Pay’s lousy and it’s pretty dull, but the position’s open.
Just avoided an internet argument by using my ‘Shield of Who the Fuck Cares What You Think’ disguised as my ‘Shield of Maturity’
… Continue ReadingWell, I do hope your cock is pleasantly
December, geez.
For an introvert, it’s a kind of hell (only with really lovely well meaning folks. And presents!).
As I’m banging this out, I’m waiting for family to arrive. They will be staying with me for a few days.
Then I will go stay there for a couple of days a little later in the month.
Then one of them will be staying with me again for a few days before Christmas.
Then … Continue Reading
I feel a little undeserving to be in the top 100 sex bloggers list this year because it seems like I haven’t really written much of interest of late (and goodness knows I ain’t gettin’ any sex to blog about!), but I DON’T CARE I’LL TOTALLY TAKE MY SPOT!! *shoves little old ladies and small children out of the way*. That makes it four years in a row! Wow!
Thank you to those lovely … Continue Reading
I got hit on at a pub by a 20-something soccer player who had earlier been wearing a dinosaur onesie.
I told him he’d have had a better chance if he’d still been wearing it. He looked at me, looked down at the onesie that he was now carrying.
“What would you do if I was still wearing it?”
“Pat your tail…”
I thought he was going to trot off and put it back on.… Continue Reading
Random stuff, no context…
…”all the best with all the oral sex you are going to be having…” and now I feel super creepy and weird…
Yes, I AM too stupid to use sex toys, it’s TRUE!
…people talking to my ass is just uncomfortable for everyone concerned…
Well, okay, fine. I suction-cupped a dildo to the fridge. Doesn’t everyone do that?
“If only you’d done your kegel exercises, flabby-vagina bitches!”
… Continue ReadingQUOTES DO NOT DIFFERENTIATE