I was talking with a friend about representation of BDSMers and F/m in particular, and how important it is to see normal healthy F/m relationships, to see versions of ourselves, ‘people like us’, and how rare it really is.
In the F/m world, the only people who actively court publicity, who do marketing, who are quoted in the media, who show their faces openly, who make noise, are pro-Dommes and findoms. And marketing is inevitably the glam and the glitter and the roleplaying.
Everyone else pretty much keeps their heads below the vanilla-flavoured parapet and does their thing quietly and anonymously even if they have a social media presence (like me, and every dominant woman and submissive man on the internet). Of course we see them at parties, at munches, at events but compared to what we see ‘out there’, that’s a tiny tiny sliver of the reality.
The reasons for this are obvious, and the impacts are also obvious.
‘Ordinary people as BDSMers’ (you and me, us, our friends) are invisible. It’s a reason that the stereotypes are still writ large on every wall and around every corner.
This photoset, therefore, is rare in its wonderful openness and affirmation. It’s not F/m-focussed, but it’s still genuine and revealing and utterly delightful.
“The idea is simple: Two black and white photographs, side by side. One of a person or couple as they presented themselves at the Folsom Street Fair, San Francisco’s legendary celebration of sexual pleasure, and one as they present themselves in their daily lives.”