Reader QnA: Would you date a 24yo?

I love reading your play stories, although sometimes I think the level of violence would overwhelm me in reality. I’ve been boxing and fighting since I was young, but I don’t know how I could handle real pain in a sexual context.

Love your commitment to fitness and the whole “mens sano in corpore sano” thing. I think I’m young for you but – would you ever consider a 24 year old?

I’m glad you’re enjoying the play stories *smile*.

“…sometimes I think the level of violence would overwhelm me in reality. I’ve been boxing and fighting since I was young, but I don’t know how I could handle real pain in a sexual context.”

Well, not everyone is into pain of course, so that’s understandable. But if you WERE to experience some kind of pain play in real life, you would hopefully do it with a dominant who you can trust to manage it in a way that worked for you both. I don’t just randomly whale on a submissive boy without knowing exactly what he likes/wants/can tolerate.

And as for the pain itself, it’s very different from boxing/fighting pain. It’s kind of like when you are all hot and heavy with your vanilla partner and they bite your neck pretty hard: It might hurt, but it’s good-hurt, hot-hurt, passion-hurt and it makes you go ‘Raaawwwrrrr!!!’. BDSM play is pretty much just like that for me and mine, only magnified to the nth degree.

“Love your commitment to fitness and the whole “mens sano in corpore sano” thing.”

Thank you. And oooh Latin… nice touch!

“I think I’m young for you but – would you ever consider a 24 year old?”

*chuckle* Thank you for asking this because it is so damn sweet!

I try not to be ageist and I wrote a bit about age differences previously. I don’t just dismiss someone due to their age, but there ARE a lot of practical issues that arise when there is a large age difference. Having said that, if I was really compatible with said theoretical 24 year old, and I really liked him, and he could convince me that he was serious, I’d be willing to give it a fair shot.

Just between you and me, I *really* wish that I enjoyed casual playthings because I think that would open up some very interesting opportunities… Just sayin’.

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10 comments

  1. awww that is cute of him to ask if you would consider someone his age. You’re correct, when it is a huge difference sometimes it can create issues. To me there is age and then there is maturity and maturity is the determining factor. I can remember when I was young being naive enough to think that “well she is older so she is more mature.”

    Respectfully,
    mysticlez

    1. “I can remember when I was young being naive enough to think that “well she is older so she is more mature.””

      *laugh* I remember thinking that too.

      In my early twenties I went out with someone nearly 10 years older. I was really disappointed when I figured that they didn’t have it all figured out, didn’t have their shit together (and in fact were more of a mess than me)!

      Ferns

    1. *smile* I’m glad it worked so well for you!

      I’m curious if you don’t mind: was it a ‘dating relationship’ with an LTR in mind (e.g. going out together, meeting each other’s friends and family, being ‘a couple’ out in the world)? Or was it more of a ‘plaything’ type relationship?

      Ferns

      1. More a play partner. We mostly got together for sex or BDSM parties. He had never experienced dominance or impact play and craved both. I was happy to help him with that. He’d never been pegged by an enthusiastic partner. Needless to say I helped him with that as well.
        He is an unusual young man, though. Mature, intelligent, good communicator, open and willing to allow intimacy.
        The best play partners for me are ones with a fatal flaw – one thing about them that keeps you from falling for them because it’s unacceptable. Age difference was the one with him. I walk a fine line because I don’t do sex without intimacy but will enjoy FWB connections.

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