Machinery

I hover with my face just above his, I can’t trust myself to touch him in the moment because I want to crash into and through him with teeth and bone and blood and the hardness of clashing steel. And even though I am soft, really, all tender and smooth flesh that gives and bends, I am afraid that I will really hurt him.

I feel like I am snarling at him, breathing into his open mouth, watching his tongue tentatively reach out to survey the damage already done to him. I’m not sure if I make any sound, but the animal noise is there in my throat and a thrumming is loud in my ears. I hear a whining engine noise in my head, creaky brakes trying to slow a huge machine that wants to barrel over the top of everything in its way, giant cogs forging ahead under load, weighty and unstoppable. I bare my teeth and try to quell the aggression until it’s manageable, under enough control that I can trust it.

He watches me, restrained, both flinching and wanting to reach for it, willing it to obliterate him. And if I wait long enough he will crane his neck to get to me, to invite me back in, and even as I nudge against him, I see him screw his eyes shut and try not to pull away when I shove myself into him again. It’s like he forgets, in those moments of reprieve, how relieved he was when I stopped.

But he hates it when I stop.

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19 Comments

  1. ~grins~ awww beautiful passion pain, pleasure, need, fear, ache, and much more! As always I love your thoughts.

    Respectfully,
    brattyboi

  2. One of the best kisses I ever got involved my girlfriend basically tackling me with her mouth. It took me maybe a couple of second to react and be able to kiss her back. Mind you, my hands were bound and I had used my safeword immediately before this, so I was already kind of reeling.

  3. Gets my approval

    Coug

    Not that you you know need my approval or anything but you have it anyway cos I’m a soppy old romantic like that ;)

  4. “@ Miss Ferns:

    “”So you’re still not using the gym regularly, then?”

    “*puzzled look* This non sequitur confuses me!””

    I meant that you clearly have excess energy that has *not* been used wholesomely, so instead are becoming yet more depraved. I am saddened by this, Miss Ferns, saddened I say.

    1. *smile* Thank you so much. And no, not shallow at all: I really REALLY miss feeling this, and trying to get some approximation of it onto the page is a joy for me.

      Ferns

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