I am not good at ‘being sexy’ in the traditional sense. Dressing the part, acting the coquette, doing that ‘sex object’ thing, flirting coyly. Yeah, I can’t do it. If I had to deliberately behave in a sexy manner, I’d fail horribly and embarrassingly. I’d be all ridiculous expressions and awkward clumsy movements.
But, I think I’m sexy. Strong, attractive, hungry when aroused. My sexuality is powerful when it’s fired up, and I think *that’s* what makes me sexy. It’s different from traditional feminine images of ‘sexy’.
My version of ‘sexy’ is about feeling my own sexuality heightened.
When I think about ‘being sexy’, I am not thinking about being the object of desire (though I love that, I do), I am thinking about how my sexuality burns and seems to seep out of my pores. It comes from inside, and the way it makes me feel changes how I am out in the world. Men sense it when it’s fired up, it makes them sit up and take notice.
While it can fire on its own, it is most evident when I am heady and full of a boy who has wound me up and taken over my thoughts, made me hyper focussed on my sexuality, triggered the part of my brain that filters everything in the world through greedy, hungry eyes. It makes me feel like I am a stalking around with a cloud of pheromones wafting around me, and every man looks like a potential target.
‘Being sexy’ is all about tapping into MY arousal and how that impacts everything about me: it changes how I look, the way I walk, my facial expressions, the tone of my voice, my body language, it makes all of my internal voices scream “WANT!!!” and it projects that desire out into the world.
To me, that’s what being sexy is about.