Pitching woo

I like to woo and seduce and flirt and reel him in, I *love* to do that, that’s how I establish the relationship and the dynamic and ‘how it will be’. The dance is a testing ground to see how we will relate, to play with each other, to find and press buttons, to push-pull and nudge at the edges.

There is a school of thought amongst some Dommes that seems to suggest that seduction is somehow disingenuous or akin to lying and therefore not within the principles of open and honest communication. They approach D/s relationships with interviews and negotiations and agreements and discussions and paperwork and to me, it is just so… cold and unappealing.

For me, the progression has to be natural, which is why I don’t do interviews or formal processes. I need it to unfold, for him to sink into his submission to me as he gets to know me, like a warm bath, or perhaps more like quicksand, all insidious and slow. I need for our interactions to inspire my dominance, to spark that part of me that wants to reach inside him and take more, and that hunger builds slowly with a series of ‘oh’ moments that make my stomach lurch with want.

I will pitch woo at a boy I am interested in like a major league pitcher, but he had better come to the party and catch, and then do some pitching of his own.

For me it’s a dance, and if he’s over against the wall and I’m dancing on my own, that’s not going to work. By the same token, while I like to lead the dance, he had better be right there with me. Oh, and give me a man who throws me into a dip now and then, and I’ll be delighted, because that’s just hot.

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17 Comments

  1. Hmmm the sterility of a contractual basis vs. the sultry of a tango that slowly ignites… I'd take the latter any day. You would indeed be a formidable seductress. And what fool would stand against the wall if you were ready to dance? :)

  2. I really love your thinking here. After meeting several Dommes in my local area, the one thing that has always been missing is the organic growth process that I think is so important.

    For me, submission is something that needs to be coaxed out and ”interviews and negotiations and agreements and discussions” just don’t do it.

    Seduction, dancing, and sinking into submission on the other hand work quite nicely… and cookies… did I ever mention I like cookies?

  3. I love it, but I'm not sure I'm much good at it. I'm peculiarly bad at spotting when a woman's flirting with me. :-(

    Sir Puppington Lothian.

  4. DC: “Hmmm the sterility of a contractual basis vs. the sultry of a tango that slowly ignites… I'd take the latter any day.”

    Oh, me too!

    “You would indeed be a formidable seductress.”

    Ha! Thank you *smiles seductively with a come hither wink*.

    “And what fool would stand against the wall if you were ready to dance?”

    The ones who confuse submission with passivity. They will wallflower themselves there for… well… forever, pretty much.

    Ferns

  5. Sweets: “I could not agree more! You always say it better than I do… it's why I stalk you with my morning coffee regularly!”

    Oh, I am honoured to share your morning coffee with you! Good morning!

    Ferns

  6. slapshot: “I really love your thinking here. After meeting several Dommes in my local area, the one thing that has always been missing is the organic growth process that I think is so important.”

    *nod* There are so many different styles, and if theirs doesn't match up with yours, I think you are kind of screwed.

    “For me, submission is something that needs to be coaxed out and ”interviews and negotiations and agreements and discussions” just don’t do it.”

    *smile* By the same token, my dominance also needs to be 'coaxed' or seduced from me. I don't just give it away you know!! Pfftt…!

    “… and cookies… did I ever mention I like cookies?”

    No, no you didn't… *gets out the baking tray*

    Ferns

  7. puppy: “I love it, but I'm not sure I'm much good at it. I'm peculiarly bad at spotting when a woman's flirting with me.”

    If she is pulling your tail or your ears, then she is flirting with you…

    Ferns

  8. Sweets: “She's probably not.”

    *laugh* Yeah, or this!

    “(JK, I was flirting there… did ya get it? hu hu?)”

    I think you scared the poor little puppy! Heh.

    Ferns

  9. dishevelleddomina: “What you said, always that way. It's the only thing that makes any sense at all to me.”

    It's the only thing that makes any sense to me too!

    Ferns

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